My [29M] best friend [29M] passed away 2 months ago. I planned on proposing to my gf [26F] this fall but now I don't feel ready. Gf thinks I'm making excuses and threatens break-up.

We've been dating for almost 3 years as of this December. A year and a half ago we had a huge fight concerning where our relationship is going. My gf wanted to get engaged around the 2 year mark but I didn't feel like we were at that stage yet. We had some issues from earlier that we were still working through and I told her I needed to feel like we were past those issues first. The issues were from both of us. She needed me to be more transparent about my feelings but I also needed her to be less temper-driven and reactive.

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Anyways earlier this year we talked about it again and after some pressing I told her I would feel ready for a proposal around the end of this year. However in June my best friend suddenly passed away and no one saw it coming. This was a guy I knew since I was 5. His parents basically took me in after my dad got abusive and my mom left. He was a brother to me. He wouldve been my best man. Anyways I'm still grieving and still dealing with knowing that I can't just text or call him anymore and I feel like my gf's sympathy is now wearing thin. She was supportive at first but last week she sat me down and had a talk about how moving on with our lives will be the best therapy. She said she wants us to keep to our own timelines because we can't let my friend's death affect our own happiness.

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Obviously I got the hint so I tried to be honest and told her that I'm not sure if I feel ready for a proposal/wedding this fall. I told her I'm still sorting through my grief and my heart just isn't in the right place. My gf got ridiculously angry and accused me of making excuses, saying that she knew that I wouldn't follow through. Hearing that really hurt since I'd already picked out a ring and everything. I just need some more time. Anyways we've been staying at separate places (gf with her friends) ever since the fight and she's been ignoring all of my texts and calls. I feel like I'm losing my mind I just can't deal with all of this. Before she left she said she wants to give me time to think things through about what I want, me or her. I guess this is her ultimatum. What do I do?

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tldr: My best friend passed away suddenly June. Gf and I planned on getting engaged this fall but now I don't feel right getting engaged just yet. Gf is angry and accuses me of making excuses. She says it's either me or her. I don't know what to do.

Submitted September 01, 2018 at 04:55PM by GrandLeek https://ift.tt/2oxBIAg