Gf [24F] made a fake-call to my [26M] new employer pretending to be an ex-coworker and told them I would be a liability. She didn't want me to take a job that would make us LDR. I still love her but feel so betrayed. Where to go from here?

I was headhunted by this very well known firm that I've wanted to work for for a really really long time. The only problem is that their HQ is three states away, and my gf was immediately turned off by the thought of long-distance. We had a big talk about it and compromised in the end where I could accept their offer as long as I'd follow her in two years when she eventually has to move up north for her Masters (we live in ATL). She's always planned on getting her graduate degree at a very specific school and we had planned to be long-distance during those 2 years, but our compromise is now that I can go work for this firm as long as I agree to move to where her school is when she goes.

So I thought we had a good deal, until I got a call from one of the partners last week about a concerning phone call he had with someone who claimed to be a female ex-coworker. I did not recognize the name he gave me and nothing lined up, including what "they" said which was that I was involved in a series of behaviorial misconduct at my prior company. I told the partner that he's free to call my references and ask that company directly and he said no worries because he didn't think it was real either.

Right after that I started calling people at my old work about potentially knowing who that person was. It was a woman and there were only 4 women in my old department, so I asked all of them and they said they had no involvement, absolutely 0. I started getting pretty paranoid and asked some friends from the same industry because I thought it was some kind of rivalry thing, then one of them suggested I ask my gf since she's the only one who knew about my job offer.

I finally sat my gf down two nights ago and told her the whole thing and asked what she thought. Immediately her reaction was off, she was nervous and wouldn't look at me and kept getting up and pretending to be really busy with something so she didn't have to face me while talking. Anyways, I won't bore you guys with the whole fight but yeah I found out that she was the one who called the partner pretending to be an ex-coworker. I was furious but even moreso when she turned it around on me and blamed ME for being a terrible boyfriend, because she said I gave her no choice but to accept an LDR. She said I steamrolled over her because I brought up her upcoming Masters program and she felt like she had no choice but to allow me to leave the state? She said it's unfair because we've always agreed that we'd be LDR when she's at school but us being LDR for my job wasn't something we had talked about or agreed on, so me springing it on her was unfair.

Honestly my head is a mess. I still love my gf and we've been together for 3 years now but this is such a huge betrayal and writing it out online is the only way I can process my thoughts without breaking down. I also don't know what I did wrong but she makes me feel like I brought this all on myself. Please help me sort this all out? What is the right path forward from here?

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TLDR: Gf made a fake-call to a new employer pretending to be an ex-coworker and told them that I would be a liability. She didn't want me to take a job out of state that would make us LDR even though we had agreed to a compromise. I still love her but feel so betrayed. Where to go from here?

Submitted November 14, 2018 at 06:18PM by throwaway34623943 https://ift.tt/2RVj95A