TL;DR: LTR failed due to declining frame, failing shit/comfort tests, and because I jumped into it with an incomplete, "phony" alpha core. Within 2 months, got my shit straight and now have four plates including my ex. Feel no attachment to any of them, and am beginning to scratch the surface of outcome independence and abundance.
I'm going to try to keep this one as concise as possible. Fellas, first of all do not ever enter into an LTR if you still have work to do on yourself. It is so easy for us to start experiencing slight abundance, get that confidence spike, and then assume we are alpha. Even if a girl with immense LTR potential begins chasing you during this period, do not consider an LTR if in the back of your mind you feel you still have work to do on yourself. You will do you and her a favor; she thinks she is landing an alpha, you will think you are an alpha, and over time the both of you will feel equally disillusioned as the facade slowly unravels in every aspect of your life. So Rule #1, do not consider an LTR until you have materialized abundance in every aspect of your life as a man.
Getting to the main point of this post, I went through a breakup a little over two months ago. It was definitely due to a loss of frame, failed comfort/shit tests over time, and just insecurity that had built up and spilled into arguing constantly. Arguing with women kills attraction and intimacy. Know this. Essentially, I was no longer the man she first fell in love with, so she said she had to let the relationship go. Important point: She was still physically attracted to me and wanted sex. It was her emotional connection that was severed. I feel this is something that gets overlooked often in the manosphere. A woman can want to fuck your brains out, but no longer trust that you can provide her what she needs in a relationship. She will leave you to become single if you start slipping as a secure, self-assured, masculine man; she may still want to fuck you though.
I did the logical thing and went full no contact. No contact is always the best strategy to heal after a breakup. As men, our biggest asset against women is our ability to walk and never look back. I knew I wanted a relationship with this woman, and if she was no longer interested in that then I had to leave. I deleted her number, and elected to ride out the shitty feelings. It sucked at first. It sucked a lot. I felt like I was going crazy. But, I stuck to my plan of no contact with the intent of healing and withdrawing from this drug. Overtime, something magical happened. I began working on myself and my internal issues. I became a more secure man through this concentrated effort on myself to improve certain aspects of my life. I believe a man upgrades, and becomes a stronger man after a high value woman leaves his life. It is like our testosterone kicks into overdrive (after the mourning period is done), and we really begin emanating this magnetic energy. Women were approaching/opening me all the sudden. I began feeling different, more attractive, less attached. From being alone and riding out those negative feelings and just focusing on getting things done to make my life better, I was actually very comfortable not having a woman around. I just needed my friends, my goals and myself.
It has been about two months since the breakup, and today I am comfortably and casually seeing four women. One of them is the same ex. She began chasing very hard, and saying how she made a mistake and we should have just communicated and worked out our issues instead of breaking up. She is acting like the girl I first met a long time ago. But I just smile to myself, because I know the game and how it works. AWALT. It is not her fault, it is simply her programming responding to my behavior, which is demonstrating alpha traits. She knows I am seeing other women, and admits it turns her on. When she asks if I see a future with her again, I tell her "We will see." But I realize now...
The only thing I want to see is other women, and my own gradual improvement.
Submitted July 30, 2018 at 11:16AM by AlternativeMain https://ift.tt/2AmvFr1
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