I (21F) just ended a two and a half year relationship with my ex (21M), and I am so torn apart about everything. He the most genuine, caring, and optimistic person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing and I truly saw a future with him one day. I am still very much in love with him, but our paths just seemed to be in different directions.
He and I started dating back in community college, where we spent a wonderful year together getting to know one another and falling in love. I eventually transfered out of state, but we were able to maintain a strong long distance relationship for the next year, visiting each other as often as we could and spending summers together.
However, after I came back to school from this last winter break something started to change within me. I never liked being one to hold myself back or closing doors to amazing opportunities. So when it came to my future after school (less than a year away at this point), I had a hard time incorperating my boyfriend into my plans. My goal has always been to apply to jobs that I believe will provide am amazing experience, is in a good location, and of course has decent pay. I wasn't planning on limiting myself to one specific state or industry at all. I was also going to be the one to graduate first, so I think ultimately we always believed that I would choose where we lived and he would find work near me. My ex was very happy to do this, always saying that I was his number one priority.
It took a while, but I finally realized why I started to feel different about us. He was ready to commit to our relationship fully, incorperating me into his life plan and making descisions around me, and I could not do the same for him. I felt guilty letting him sacrifice so much because I just wasn't at the same level he was. He discussed going for his Master's after school many times throughout our relationship, but he was willing to put that on hold despite the fact that he already has professors ready to back him. I could not be the reason that he didn't persue this and the other amazing opportunities I knew were coming his way.
So I ended it, the future is just so uncertain for us and the long distance has not made any of it easier. I may have just made the absolute worst mistake of my life, but at least I hope that I am not holding him back anymore. I keep going back to that one saying, "If you love someone, set it free. If it comes back it was meant to be". So who knows, maybe I'll finally be ready one day to fully incorperate him into my plans, but I also need to be realistic.
Has anyone else gone through a situation like this? How did you cope? I guess I am just looking for some support right now and some positive outcomes to give me hope.
TLDR: I broke up with my boyfriend because he was willing to sacrafice the start of his career just to stay with me and I wasn't. I felt like I was holding him back and ultimately decided to let him go. I still love him and am hurting deeply. Looking for some encouragement.
Submitted April 10, 2022 at 04:40PM by DigitalDream25 https://ift.tt/XAvd7H8
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