Should I speak to his wife and get her story?

I'll keep this as short as possible, would appreciate some advice.

I've been with my(f34) boyfriend(m35) for just over a year. We just bought a house together a few months ago.

He has a 14 year old daughter who he doesn't see due to her mum stopping contact and turning his daughter against him.

He also has a son who is 6 who he doesn't see either. He is still married to his sons mother but they've been separated for 5 years and she hates him. She stopped contact for no reason and she only allows him to see his son for a few minutes at birthdays/Christmas.

I've never spoken to his exes but he's told me that they both want to ruin his life and hate him for no reason. I know both his ex's have been with their boyfrinds for years and seem happy.

I sometimes feel like he isn't telling me the whole truth and whenever I try to ask more questions, he gets quite defensive.

We once bumped into his ex and son in a shop last year. my boyfriend completely ignored her while only talking to his son. She said hi to me and I said hi back but I felt very awkward and afterwards he would barely talk about it and said he didn't want to introduce us because she is crazy and would try to ruin our relationship.

What should I do? I want to marry this man one day and I love him. Should I reach out to his wife and get her side of the story? Or just leave it?

Thanks

EDIT: just want to add, he has a lot of amazing qualities and I really love him. He's had a hard life and has admitted to making mistakes in his past but I really want our relationship to work. I believe him but I have that niggling feeling in the back of my mind that is more of a what if?

EDIT. OK, for the marriage part. I only recently found out he is still married AFTER we bought our house. He told me he hasn't divorced her because it would be over 1k and he is mentally drained because she lies about everything etc.

I've read all of your responses and appreciate all the advice. I still want to be with him, I love him. I just don't know what to do now.

Tl,dr: my boyfriend says his two kids mums are crazy, is still married to one of them. He gets defensive when I ask questions. Should I speak to his wife?

Submitted October 25, 2021 at 05:14AM by needadvice8pls https://ift.tt/3pFW62Z