My (31F) downstairs neighbor (65/70ish F) is relying too much on me and I don't know how to draw a limit without disrespecting her.

Hi! I've been living alone in my apartment for about two and a half years, and I have very few neighbors (it's a small building of 12 apartments, and two out of the four apartments that surround mine are empty). The neighbors upstairs are two very aggressive and addicted men who everyone hates, so we don't talk to them. My downstairs neighbor is a widow in her late 60s early 70s , her husband died while they were sleeping about two years ago, and they had no children, she has no family and her only real life "friends" is an elderly couple who live on the other side of the building (they just say hi and talk for a bit when they meet on the hallway). I say "friends" because she says she has many, but all online, she kind of works selling stuff on Facebook and Twitter. She has a few mobility issues (she can walk but used a cane and is very slow), so she hired a girl to help her do basic stuff like walking down to the grocery store, going to the bank with her,etc. The girl is on summer vacation so she asked me if I could buy some things for her when I go to the store, I said yeah sure No problem. But then she said "great, so you can come with me to the bank on Monday, and then take me to pay the bills" she didn't ask it, she said it. I helped her a few times (walked her down the street, or went to the store for myself and got her a few things on the way). We share my WiFi and she's super responsible when she has to pay.

The thing is, that's about as much as I can help, because I have a full time job, and I'm barely in my house. I feel like shit having to say no to her many requests to: help her fix her cellphone, or explain to her why her Facebook doesn't work because someone "reported" her account (I don't use Facebook so I wouldn't know how to help her), she texts me constantly telling me to drop by, but every time I do she talks for hours about her medication and depression, and her husband... I get it, I know she's lonely and I swear it breaks my heart. But I can't be her friend or her companion. I can be a helpful neighbor once in a while, and I help her (selflessly, I think) as much as I can. It's peak summer here and the power has been out for the last two or three days in the neighborhood, so I haven't been home much. Right now I'm writing this because she's begging me to go help her with something she didn't say what was, but I know it's just an excuse to talk to someone. Again, this breaks my heart but I have commitments to attend to.

How do I politely tell her that I can't be there all the time, that I am not her companion? I don't want to offend her, she's sweet and very kind, but I feel really uncomfortable when she asks me to be a companion.

Tl;dr : My elder neighbor is being dependant of me and I feel like shit having to put a stop on it.

Submitted February 08, 2020 at 09:33AM by MaggieSmithsSass https://ift.tt/2H9uvPY