My (33F) husband (33m) got upset at me for admitting I've adjusted to our lack of sex life. Was I way off base? Together 7 years.

The one issue between me and my husband is that our sex life petered out early on and we maybe have sex once a month or every other month. It used to bother me and I used to get frustrated and we would try to work on it, but eventually I just kind of gave up and let myself adjust. My husband has a very low libido, and I think I had an average one.

Honestly now because we just don't have sex often, he finishes really quickly and I rarely orgasm. It doesn't bother me, I get it. He also isn't into porn and rarely masturbates. I'm also not a woman who anyone is hitting on in public or chasing or anything. I'm a solid 4/10. So I can understand how between the two of us, his sex drive is low to begin with and I'm not exactly Emma Watson here.

Anyway the other day when we were out for a walk he commented that we hadn't had sex in a while. We weren't in a super public place, we were on a back trail through the apartment complex we live in headed to a park. He brought it up first is what I'm trying to drive at.

I said "That's okay, I understand."

He said "You used to get really frustrated about it. What changed?"

I hesitated but then said, "Well, I'm used to us kind of being that couple that just doesn't have sex. It's okay."

The look on his face was horrified and he got really, REALLY upset. He told me that was a mean thing to say, I was way off base, that he couldn't believe I'd say that.

I said, "Look, I didn't mean it in a bad way. I really mean it when I say that I'm used to it. We're just not one of those couples who has a lot of sex and is into all that. It's fine."

But this was the wrong thing to say, I guess, because he became so angry about it that he just turned around and walked home. Later in the day I asked him why he was so mad at me, and he said "You really don't get how shitty it is to hear that from your own wife?"

From my perspective, I was just trying to show love and support for who we are as a couple. I am not a hot, sexy babe who someone would be insane about trying to bed. He does not have a high sex drive. We fit together really well and at this point, I am at peace with things.

But his reaction has me so confused. Was it wrong for me to say that? Is there something terribly wrong with the fact that my own libido eventually adjusted to the lack of sex?

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tl;dr: Husband and I don't have a very active sex life. I used to try to solve it or fix it but it never really changed. So instead, I adjusted. I admitted this to him and he got upset. Why is he upset? Was I wrong to admit that I adjusted?

Submitted April 25, 2019 at 01:00PM by idkwhathappens http://bit.ly/2XK9lhH