This is really only the major issue I have with him, but I'm not really sure how to manage this anymore. I'll just get straight to the point. Every so often my boyfriend puts a few fingers in my bottom during sex.
I've always been clear that I don't really want to try butt stuff, but if it was something he was interested in we could try, but he always assured me he wasn't interested in that. About 8 months ago, we were having sex and he did it for the first time without talking about it. I was quite uncomfortable and it was painful so I asked him to stop and he did, but when we started having sex again he did it again. We talked about it afterwards, and I was clear that I did not want that and he said that was fine. I asked if he was interested in that and he said that he wasn't, he just thought I might like it.
It was fine for a while, maybe a month or two. Then he did it again. Again, I asked him if he was actually in to that, again he said he no and I said "don't do that. It hurts and I don't like it". So this was fine, until about a month or so again. Also, around the same time he choked me a little. I'd always been clear that I didn't want that due to some personal trauma, and it hadn't ever been an issue until then.
It feels like it always happens if I've upset him in the days preceding the incident, so I'm not sure if it's something to do with that. With everything else, he's great, and before this started we had a great sex life. But lately I feel unsure about sex (although we still have sex). I've spoken to him about it and he just says things like "oh, but you know you like it" or "Well, I thought you would like it" and then he apologises and it doesn't happen for a few weeks or so.
I don't know if I'm overreacting or not, or how to deal with this.
Tl;dr- my boyfriend is pushing past some sexual boundaries like putting fingers in my bum and I'm not sure how to deal with it or if I'm overreacting.
Submitted April 26, 2019 at 07:13PM by pashionfroot http://bit.ly/2GIiPTB
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