Boyfriend (27M) has asked me(22F) to apply for a joint loan so he can consolidate debt and avoid high interest rates

Hi! So I think I’m looking mostly at the emotional element to this question to post this in r/relationships. If you have financial advice for me regarding this situation, however, I appreciate any advice!

So essentially here’s the rough background:

-Dating 1.5 years

-Live together, on lease and all utilities

-Share credit cards (to earn relevant rewards points, managed very well by him)

-share access to all accounts via LastPass app

-he currently has $10K or so in credit card debt from his move from another country to America (where we live now) to pursue a dream of his

-he makes a bit more than I make, but his money has been going directly to pay his credit card bills to avoid accruing any interest (and hasn’t yet)

-I have been spotting the shared credit card bills because I can afford to and encourage him to pay down his past credit card debt as a priority, again to avoid interest. This was offered by me, and not asked by him. We have a running, perfectly accurate spreadsheet of what he “owes” to me

-I have significant student loan debts to achieve my own goals, somewhere around $70K so far and I still have a couple years...

Basically, I worry I’ll be short-sighted in this decision. And I wanted a pair of other eyes to assess this situation with me. I don’t trust my family’s judgment so I will not be looking to them on this. We also are not particularly close.

My own plan is to be self-sufficient and to begin a higher-paying career when I get my degree to start paying down my loans before I consider marriage with my boyfriend. And I do consider marriage. But this is a situation I want figured out, and I don’t want to make a mistake. Because it may very well affect our future together.

His plan is to consolidate his debt via personal loan, to avoid the impending accrual of interest on his scattered credit card debts. The interest rate on the personal loan is less than a credit card, but more than he’d like to accept. A solution to lower the interest rate is to apply, with me, on a joint loan. So my (excellent) credit will report to the application, in addition to his, and in addition to our joint income. It will lower it substantially and is a really good idea.

I trust him fully to take responsibility for this loan. No part of this proposition from him includes me being expected to pay down his debts. And again, we have this all outlined and separated thoroughly and honestly. I’m quite surprised with how seamlessly we’ve traversed finances in our relationship thus far, really.

The obvious is that I’m on the hook for the life of the loan contractually, and it’s not an amount to be paid down immediately. It will take some time. I think of it in terms of my own student loans, just with a bit of a higher interest rate. So, god forbid, we break up, I have to explain to a potential next partner that I’m indefinitely linked to my ex? I don’t know about refinancing; but if there would be a way to get off the loan I know my current boyfriend would be willing to explore that possibility. I suppose I just worry if this is a HUGE commitment and I’m overlooking some potentially big problems.

When we talked about this (which we will and can do more, it was just brought up to me today and I’d like to deliberate on my own), he (kinda romantic to me...) commented on the risks of such a commitment, but stated he is willing to make this jump for himself because of the future he sees with me. I know this was honest and not a manipulative move or anything. And I wonder if perhaps I’m just worried of the commitment it would be to him? Not as if I’m not prepared for that, but that I’m scared I’m too comfortable tying myself to him financially in such a big way.

I suppose I’m wondering if this sounds like an ok idea, as long as I’m comfortable and sure of our relationship? Or if it’s wrong of him to ask this if me? It doesn’t seem that way to me. But I care deeply for this man and want to help take care of him in anyway I can. I know he does the same for me.

Anyway, I hope this all makes sense. I can elaborate where need be. I know this was long winded hahah. Thanks for any help!!

Edit: thanks for the responses so far!! I told him I wanted until the end of the weekend to think it over. I’m leaning far toward “no,” but will continue to consider and may post an update later

—

tl;dr: Boyfriend has asked me to apply for a joint loan so he can consolidate debt and avoid high interest rates. He’s accepting of either response for me, but I’m unsure if this could be a big mistake for me/us

Submitted September 27, 2018 at 02:36PM by throthromi https://ift.tt/2N7B7z5