My bf & I recently got into a huge argument, that initially started bc I asked him not to yell at me. The reason he claimed I got yelled at is bc I ask too many questions, and it makes him feel I’m looking for problems, rather then being curious about the topic. I never mean to come across that way, it’s just I hv two jobs, never see or talk to him unless I make time out of my schedule & I don’t want to be disconnected to my partner. And maybe wanting that is fine, but the way I go about it isn’t. He gets mad that recently if we’re watching tv I say things like “who texted you” bc he will look at it & or reply. I don’t think he’s cheating, but I think he’s grown annoyed of me to where everything I do bugs him. During today’s fight I think a lot of different issues rolled out from the Matt, I told him will find time after work to discuss them & he said “discussing them doesn’t work” I feel like he’s ready to leave me, and why wouldn’t he if he feels that unheard. I feel like him feeling unheard is giving me a reaction of him stonewalling me, and wanting nothing to do with how I feel, he’s put a lot of my needs above him in the pass, and if he’s at a point where he feels when I do ask him to talk to me & he doesn’t.. I royally fucked up.
I’m not sure what to do from here, I mean obviously I’m hurt but clearly so is he, he’s a really good guy & a selfless person. I think he gets kind of 0-100 over tiny things recently like asking who texted him bc he feels like I don’t care, so when I ask to him it probably looks like I’m ready to lunge at him for an argument. I don’t know how; or even think I can change his perspective of me. I just think he’s finally projected onto me that I like to pick fights & anything I do out of curiosity or conversation just looks like the start of an argument to him.
TLDR; My bf seem like he’s built a perspective of me always trying to pick fights. To the point where if I ask questions out of pure curiosity I get yelled at, one of them are “who are you texting” when we’re trying to watch tv together. I work 6/7 days a week, so I never see him much as it is. Everything I do bothers him to where he doesn’t want to communicate the issue anymore. Him feeling unheard is giving me a reaction of stonewalling, he’s a selfless person who use to put me first, so I know I really fucked up somewhere. I think he’s made up this perspective that I’m always out to get him & find something to be mad, when I’ve never been that kind of gf.
Submitted December 02, 2021 at 12:41AM by user080994 https://ift.tt/3Ib4dvf
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