Dating abusive girl for 2 years, lost my job and she broke up with me

Hello guys,

This summer Me (31 M) and my ex (26 F) were planning to get married but she decided to break up with me. We've been dating for 2 years and I was trying my best during this time. Unfortunately our relationship happened during pandemic and after 7 months of dating I was laid-off from my work.I was depressed I was not able to be the man she deserved and that was eating me inside and my self esteem suffered. I was still acting normal, but word "acting" really describes what was going on within me.

Around same time she started to acting colder. She often repeated that I'm lucky that I have such a beautiful girlfriend. She started pointing that I'm too old for her, sometimes making fun on my physical attributes saying that I should straighten my tooth, fix my nose etc. which made me fill even more like a sh*t.

I tried to fix things, on St. Valentines day I gave her 200 roses and she said that her ex gave her 1 rose but it was more romantic than what I did. On our Anniversary I took her to Dominican Republic to the best hotel I could afford and she said that the place was amazing but she was bored with me. Since I was not working I cooked all our meals, Every morning I went to the coffee shop to get her the hazelnut coffee that she likes before she wakes up, after her workouts I ordered smoothie deliveries even if I was not around - just to show that I fu**ng care..... I swear I did!

Every nice gesture that I did had a reverse effect on her and she acted even more hostile. One night I asked her if she still considers marrying me to which she shouted something like "stop annoying me I'm watching something.. she was watching a video", this broke my hearth.. not that it was something major, but I felt so insignificant at that moment. I just left and didn't call her again. I decided that enough is enough. I concentrated on my career and told my parents that wedding is off - they were devastated.. She understood what happened and tried to patch things and called me many many times but for me it was over. I dumped that bi*ch and in 3 months joined FAANG as a Software Engineer in Europe.

When she called me to return my stuff she asked what I'm up to and I told her about my relocation and my new job. That night she texted me that she is missing me. Funny..

I wished her all the best and told her that it was my fault and my mistakes that led to this outcome so she doesn't blame her. To my surprise she agreed and said that indeed I could have been a better boyfriend which again reassured me that she doesn't deserve a second chance.

This relationship left a scar in me, I still feel not good enough at times. I don't trust women as I used to and became more cynical realizing that perhaps only your parents will love you unconditionally - everyone else will love for something.

TL;DR I was dating abusive girl for 2 years, lost my job and she broke up with me

Submitted December 03, 2021 at 03:14PM by Dubinko https://ift.tt/31wjJ42