[Infidelity] My [30m] fiance [28F] cheated on me with one of my best friends. Turns out "our" child isn't even mine.

Pretty much what the title says. I've been with my fiance "Jen" for 7 years now and I always thought we had the Disney romance. Fell in love almost immediately, pictured being married until we were old etc.

We met at uni and after I graduated and locked down a solid, well paying, stable job I busted my ass to help pay for her tuition so she could graduate with as little debt as possible. I've always been a hard worker and worked 2 jobs when I was studying so I could graduate with no debt so it's not like it wasn't something she had no idea about. Granted it caused a lot of issues but I always went out of my way to not let it effect the relationship. Where we live theres a florist that does same day delivery so most of the time when I had to work late I would send her flowers with a note that said something funny or sweet. Shit like that. Anyway a few years ago we got into a huge fight about it and I basically just laid it out straight. I'm working so much so we can set ourselves up for an amazing life together and she seemed to accept it for the most part.

Fast forward a few years and she's graduated, working full time as well and I pop the question. She could barely stop crying enough to say yes. I was the happiest man on the planet and immediately started planning things. We decided to set the date for August 2021 so her family from overseas would have enough time to save up to make the trip. Her brother doesn't have the sort of job that allows him to save money so for her birthday that year I surprised her by printing out a screen shot of a secret bank account I set up so I could pay for the flights. We were happy. Or so I thought. December 2018 she sat me down and told me she was pregnant. She kept apologising and begging for forgiveness. Even offering to have it "taken care of". I kept telling her I'm not mad and that it's a good thing. It just means we get to start our family sooner and we can spend more time with our kid. But she wouldn't stop apologising and crying. Her reaction weirded me out cause we always talked about having kids. This should've been my first clue right?

While she was pregnant I basically dropped all of my hobbies, picked up even more shifts and basically became a social hermit except for date nights with her and my "best friend" Jim. I've known Jim since we were 11. Grew up together, shared everything (heh) and on a few occasions I've literally bled for him as well. Jim was always the life of the party and never took things seriously. But something happened when we were 23-24 and instead of being a happy drunk that everyone loved he turned into the sort of asshole that would get hammered and more often than not start a fight or some bullshit.

While I was working to make sure this kid would be taken care of Jen became distant. Only wanted to watch TV and have sex, never wanted to talk etc. So I would randomly confide in Jim over drinks and everytime he would say something along the lines of "you're too good for her, dump her" etc. At first I thought he was just trying to be a bro but it got weird. The more I confided, the more he would verbally suck my dick about how I'm the best person he's ever met, i deserve a better partner and friends etc. Second fucking clue I should've picked up on.

After she gave birth I couldn't have been happier. I spent every waking moment with her and the kid. Due to some complications with the birth she had to spend a week or so longer in the hospital and I spent most of my time there. One morning I woke up to Jen crying and saying sorry over and over again. I asked her what's wrong and she told me that she had been sleeping with Jim for almost 2 years and she had to tell me before I signed the birth certificate. My whole world came crashing down and I just walked out of the room, got in my car and drove home. I ignored my phone blowing up from both her and Jim, packed up her shit, left a note telling her not to be there when I got back and drove to another friend of mines place 7 hours away where I went on an insane drug and alcohol fuelled bender. On the way i rang my boss, told him the situation and said "i have 6 weeks of leave built up. I'm taking them". Lucky for me my boss is amazing and told me fuck the 6 weeks. Just come back when you can.

So between October last year and now I've just gone off the rails. I talked to Jen twice and just asked why and why him. She gave me some bullshit about feeling like she missed out on her youth by staying with me, she was lonely, he was there etc. At the end of the phonecall I said cool and hung up. The second time was after I got a lawyer and the paternity test results came back. I basically made it clear we're done and I'm not raising the kid. Haven't spoken to her since but that hasn't stopped her harassing me and even my co-workers in an effort to talk to me. I haven't talked to Jim but earlier in January he tried to kill himself. His sister sent me a text message asking me to go visit him and I told her no and that I'm only sorry he didn't do me a favour and succeed. Not my proudest moment but fuck him. I'm not even convinced he actually tried. Knowing him he just said he did because thats been his fucking MO since day 1. Whenever he gets caught for his bullshit just make himself the victim.

But now my family are pissed at me for "abandoning" Jen's kid. I cut off most contact with my mum and sisters because they kept giving me shit. My mum even showed up to my house to guilt trip me into going back saying the kid deserves a father. I told her that he already has a father and it isn't me. My friends are also giving me shit about cutting Jim off.

So here I am. In my new apartment with a few grammes of coke after polishing off a bottle and a half of jack, waiting for my tinder date to show up. Wondering where do I even begin to go from here? Sorry if this was hard to read but I'm just blurting shit out. Hoping someone somewhere can tell me what to do next? I mean I'm not a perfect person. I have my flaws. I fucked up things in the relationship but I don't think I ever deserved this.

TL;DR: ex fiance was fucking my best friend behind my back. Our kid turned out to be their kid. No support, no family, no friends. Where do I go from here?

Submitted February 03, 2020 at 11:31PM by WellImFucked222 https://ift.tt/37SeCcu