I (32F) want to allow my brother (27M) to live in our basement apartment. My husband (39M) wants to rent it out, and he says its his decision because he was the one who had the house gifted to him. We do not have money issues, and I am upset at his lack of compassion towards my brother.

It was an incredible surprise when my husbands uncles will listed him as receiving his house in Brooklyn. My husband has 4 uncles and 3 aunts, and he isn't very close to any of them, so this was insanely shocking. He hadn't seen that uncle since apparently thanksgiving 4 years ago. But getting the house was a blessing unlike anything else. We weren't exactly doing well financially before with high rents, and now we are able to save quite a lot of money. The house is gorgeous and sizeable. And it is worth quite a lot, in a very desirable location, which is great for the long term financially. It has a ground floor/basement apartment, which is largely separate from the rest of the house.

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Unfortunately, my mother died recently, and my brother who lives with her has no place to go now. He has one month of rent money left apparently. He has a disability which makes it difficult to walk properly, along with other issues, notably fatigue, and with the pandemic especially its become practically impossible for him to find a job. My first solution was that he lives in the basement apartment under us. My husband had plans to rent it out, but they weren't very solid, definitive plans. Right now its largely just sitting there gathering dust. I figured my husband would put that aside for the sake of my brother, but instead he refused the idea of it, saying that he isn't going to give up potential rent money for our brother. We got into a big argument, or rather, I got into an argument with him, and he sort of just refused to budge and thought it was kind of ridiculous. He said our brother can move to go live with one of my other family members, but they all largely live in the UK and have families and don't have, you know, an entire apartment just laying around. My husband then basically implied that this was his house, not mine, because it came from his uncle, not mine. He has in the past had that sort of attitude about things, and I think it came from his parents who are very much like that. They love each other a lot, but financially and property wise they consider each other to be separate entities.

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I just find this entire situation to be so disheartening, how he could be so dismissive about helping my brother out. I told my husband, if he comes, we would make sure he is looking for a job right away, and then he can make the decision if he wants to move out or pay rent. He called my brother a 'freeloader' at one point, which really upset me. My brother is a very determined individual, but he is disabled, even though he downplays it very much and pretends its no big deal. If my husband had a similar situation with a sibling of his, I would 100% allow them to stay, let alone if we had a whole empty apartment. And also, its frustrating because if my husband really desperately wanted the rent money, why has he waited so long to rent it out? He hasn't even started the renovations he wanted to do down there, and its been months and months.

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What am I supposed to do? I am just disturbed at his callousness, and I am not sure what to do with my brother. He is aware of the apartments existence. He knows nobody is living there. I don't think he expects to be allowed to stay there, but at the same time I feel he is going to be hurt if we don't offer him. And the rest of the family is going to view us badly too most likely.

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TL;DR - - Brother doesn't have a place to stay and my husband doesn't want to let him stay in the downstairs apartment below our home.

Submitted March 22, 2021 at 10:33PM by No_Judge4415 https://ift.tt/2QorOlu