I am from an Asian country and I visit a foreign country (in latin america) for business purposes -almost every alternative month. Over the last year, I made real close friends with this girl (Kathy) who works for one of my clients. She was the very few ones who speaks good english (which is quite rare in this part of the world) and we hit it off immediately. She graduated from a top university here, is smart, funny and very dedicated to her profession. We both have the same sense of humor and generally have the same set of beliefs about life except one (she doesn't want kids in the future). So I asked her out the very first week of meeting her and she accepted. We had a terrible first date where we were interrupted by a drunk co-worker who decided to take up all of our time. We didn't really pursue it after that as I came back to my country.
During my next couple of visits to this country, we met but purely as friends. She was dating a girl which ended within 2 weeks. She then dated another American [34M] who she fancied a lot. She used to always talk about him infront of me, which I didn\t really care for much. Meanwhile I dated other girls - clubs, tinder, gym etc. Cut to 5 months later when I'm back in her country. By this time, our friendship has grown quite stronger - she has become my emergency contact, my parents call her when they can't reach me, I keep her informed about the clubs I\m going to (some neighborhoods can get pretty dangerous at night in latin america). By this time, the American has gone back to America 2 months ago. He was here for one project which ended and he mostly will never come back.
Meanwhile I've made Kathy my bro. I invite her to game nights, parties etc. at my apartment. Some of my other friends have often confused her to my girlfriend which I've refused immediately and she has always laughed. But to be very honest, I always felt she was attracted to me by the way she would hug me or talk to me. But since I was over her for quite a while and was in a casual dating mode, she wasn\t really was of much interest to me.
Cut to 2 days ago. We went to a nearby town in the hills and in the moment, made out with each other. She came back to my apartment (I was hoping she didn't because I had work to do), and we went to second base. That night I told her that her friendship is the most important to me and I would never give that up for anything - so as long as it doesn't affect our friendship, we can explore dating or whatever. The next day she wanted to hold my hands in public (not in the office though). That night we were watching a movie and eventually ended up having sex. The sex was great (in my opinion). She left early morning because she goes to work very early. After that, she has been responding to my texts in one word, won't pick up my calls.
Can anyone help me understand what is going through her mind? What should I do?
TLDR: had a girl best friend. we dated different people through the year. had sex recently and now she wont talk to me.
Submitted February 22, 2020 at 07:14AM by adnansami444 https://ift.tt/39YasjS
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