Boyfriend [23m] hurt me[22F] last night during an argument about sex and refuses to apologize because he says I was being weird and deserved it

I'm still so confused about what happened, it doesn't make any sense to me why he was so angry. Sorry for the long story in advance.

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We'd been having some disagreements about sex/intimacy recently. We also have been having sex very infrequently, maybe once every couple of weeks, which feels very frustrating for me. For the first year+ of our relationship, we'd had sex without a condom because I was on birth control, and were intimate once or twice a week. After he came back from Christmas vacation, he suddenly didn't trust that anymore and said he would only pull out. I asked if there was something wrong, thinking maybe something had happened that made him worry I wasn't reliable anymore, and offered to get an IUD so he would feel more secure because I didn't want him to be stressed about any pregnancy risks. (To be clear, I don't want him to do anything he doesn't want to. I was only asking about it because it was a new thing.) This turned into him berating me and saying that I was scaring him by pressuring him to have sex every day and pressuring him not to pull out.

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Fast forward to last night, we were watching a show with a sex scene, and the female character got upset when the guy she was hooking up with didn't pull out. He pointed and was like, "see it's not normal to want that, I don't know why you're weird about it." We went to bed and I asked him not to call me weird for expressing something that I wanted. I mentioned wanting to be intimate more frequently and framed it as just wanting to be close to him, not even about the sex. He started accusing me of being demanding and forcing him to have sex. I kept telling him that I didn't want to force him to do anything he wasn't okay with and that I wanted to compromise. I said that even if we weren't having sex that often, I just wanted to be physically affectionate with him (making out, massages, etc. ) because that's my love language. He was accusing me of never being happy with him, calling me crazy over and over, and calling me a harpy. At some point he sat up, and while still laying on the bed, I moved over like 6 inches to get under the blanket more. He lay back down right on top of where I was, put all his weight on me, and dug his elbows into my sides so that I would move back over. He was telling me to move, that I was being weird, and to stop attacking him, and I was telling him to stop because he was hurting me. I couldn't move because all of his weight was on me. At some point he rolled off of me and I was crying because my ribs were hurting really badly (he's twice my size). I asked him to apologize, and he was like "I didn't hurt you, you liked it because you're bored and want to cause drama. Stop being annoying and nagging me, all you want to talk about is sex." On top of this, he was high during this whole argument and kept laughing at me when I would express being upset about something he said.

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When we woke up this morning, I was hoping he was sobered up so I asked him to apologize, but all he said was "I didn't do anything wrong. You're the problem, you need to learn."

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I know this is a huge red flag, but is there any way I can get through to him that he's hurting me emotionally and now physically? He used to be so sweet and caring until we moved in together, I don't know what to do to get that person back.

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TL;DR: boyfriend blames me for his anger

Submitted February 02, 2019 at 03:21PM by throwawayyy00006 http://bit.ly/2Gk6ExQ