TL;DR Do I have to suck it up and 'do the right thing' and support my sister through this (self-inflicted) difficult time in her life, or can I politely make excuses to not spend time with her and her baby? (I would never let her know I think this way!)
My sister has a four-month-old baby. I've been a nanny and babysitter and at around 22 decided I just didn't want kids. I don't mind older kids for company, but after having 'done' kids as a job, I'm bored of them!
There, I've said it: kids are boring - especially babies. They're either boring, or they're annoying. I know some people will think I'm horrible, because kids are boring because developmental brain stage, or annoying because developmental brain stage. Yes, I know. I literally studied this at university.
On the other hand, I Of Course want to support my sister during this new, difficult, weird time of her life. I sympathise with her exhaustion and stress. But in my head I'm also kind of 'well yeah, what did you expect?' she wanted kids badly, but hadn't done much more than hold a friends baby at a lunch out. So Every Little discovery is a new one for her. The sleepless nights, the crying/screaming for no discernable reason, the gas, the gross poops etc. Bbut I miss my sister, I miss discussing normal adult things with her. I understand I've essentially lost that in her for a while.
On to the actual scenario: I work a busy job and only get so many days off per month. I want to use these to recoup, to catch up on chores or errands or to pursue my hobbies. My sister now wants (maybe expects?) me to spend time with her and her baby. I *understand* why the baby is all consuming, but I just have NO interest in driving the 1h to visit, sitting around discussing the baby's sleep, poops, eating, smiling and listen to it scream when it eventually screams.
Submitted November 23, 2020 at 02:10PM by Zorgas https://ift.tt/35YflKI
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