I [M24] have been dating this girl for 8 months now, I have met her while being on vacation and by coincidence she came to work in my home country for one year. At the moment, I am also studying in another country, so it's a LDR at the moment and will stay for that for the next 1-2 years because she will go back to her home country to finish her study and then return.
Firstl of all, i am quite insecure and can make some drama out of nothing, so I prefer to ask third-parties.
One thing that has been bothering me for some time is her crushes. She has a huge crush on a rapper and constantly listens to his music and ever now and then drops some comments. For example, we were in his city where he lives and she said "what would you do if he came to me in a car and invited me" or her recent line she said today, that was annoying me "I am wondering about me and X in a relationship", or "oh what a man, he is a real man" when she was playing a music video of him. She always super freak about it "He is so smart and intelligent" etc.
I have talked about this topic once because she was having a crush on some guy on instagram and was whispering "oh honey, please reply to my question" (was some Q&A stories, idk). It was really hurting me and I talked with her about it. She said that she will not do it again.
Secondly, she has a crush on a football player for years and has told me that she already wrote some sex stories about him like 1-2 years ago. When he got a new girlfriend who was about his age, she said "Oh i still have a chance with him".
When we are watching movies, I can already kinda guess when she is gonna say that she had a crush on some actor. Once she also tried to shape my hair like the actor.
Sometimes i just got the feeling that i am not the one she is really attracted to. I really don't know these kind of stuff since I have never really had a celeb crush. Ofc i also jerk off to porn stars or celebs but I was never really obsessed with any and would masturbate to them regurlarly like she told me, she used to. These guys just don't look like me at all, mostly they got long hair and a nice beard. She also tries to change my haircut and beard at some point, and told me that she is doing it because she loves me and wants to improve it. I am really offset sometimes that these guys get more compliments than she is giving me. I know that she has other ways of showing it but sometimes it is just awful. I sometimes got the feeling she does this to make me feel insecure. She sometimes complain about how i dress or tells me "why don't you dress like that". A few weeks ago we were a in a city and she was saying "I wanted to dress up nicely and you run around like this". She told me that was the way she talks to her friends. It might be that he was joking, but even as a joke is it acceptable?
One last thing is that she has always been into superpowers and asked me "What would you do if superman came and said he and she belong to each other to save the world?". She said something, that she wasn't quite sure how she would react if superman came to her room and wants to sleep other. I know her fantasy is quite big but I am confused and hurt sometimes. Ofc, this is super unrealistic and this example was not bother me that much, it's just so random sometimes.
I really don't know how to react to it, i don't want to show my insecurity every time. I mostly try to react in a funny way "oh ye he seems to be quite attractive, maybe he would cook me a nice meal" (when a guy was gay). But sometimes i get jealous about it and have a bad feeling in my stomach. Lastly, she also meet some random people on Couchsurfing and i already had a bad feeling when i saw a guy who looked similar to her recent crushes. Unfortunetly, sometimes i got the feeling that the amount of crushes is increasing, btw for her crushes are people who she finds attractive.
Am i just too insecure or is she going to far?
Sorry for the wall of text, just felt good to write that.
Thanks for your help, i appreciate it.
tl;dr
My gf has some celebrity/influencer crushes and it is putting me down lately, especially since we are in a LDR.
Submitted September 30, 2020 at 05:25PM by Windoit https://ift.tt/2HOC4zr
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