I (30M) have been with my girlfriend (30F) for 10 years, living together for 5. She recently told me she and her girlfriends have booked a trip out of state to go to a Male strip club.
I told her this makes me uncomfortable but she is going anyways. It's hard for me to put into words exactly what I'm feeling so it's making it hard to communicate with her about it.
It's not about a physical act of cheating, I know she'd never do that. It just doesn't feel right that she'd get some sort of pleasure from seeing that. However I also don't want to be a controlling asshole to her either. My feelings about this are jumbled. Any advice? A portion of me feels like this is a dealbreaker and wants to break up with her.
Tl;dr Girlfriend is going to a Male strip club after I told her it makes me uncomfortable.
Edit: Thank you all for your takes on this situation. I appreciate that there are many people on both sides of what is going on, it shows that this is a complicated issue and there is no right or wrong response. After reading each and every response (multiple times) this is what I have decided to do:
1) I won't be controlling and tell her she can't go. 2) I will talk to her more in depth about the trip and about what they plan on doing. 3) I'll tell her where my personal boundaries are, mainly that I won't be ok with her getting a lap dance or touching a dancer. 4) If her friends do actually hook up with anyone, find out what my GF plans to do during this time.
For us and our relationship, I feel like these are reasonable expectations that don't broach into being controlling. If she can't respect these wishes then I don't feel like I'm being overly dramatic or insecure about breaking things off.
Again, thank you all for your opinions and support, you have all helped me untangle my feelings on this subject.
Submitted January 27, 2019 at 03:33PM by thrwawyaccnt12 http://bit.ly/2DDMOvT
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