Recently engaged. Fiancé (28m) has always wanted kids, I (24f) don’t. My mum (51f) said I’m selfish, I’m feeling really bad.

Throwaway.

My fiancé and I have been together for nearly a decade, he has always said he wanted children and I have always said I don’t. He proposed and I said yes of course, we are still as perfect as we always were and love each other dearly but I’m feeling really awful knowing he’ll probably not get children.

I brought it up with him and he said he thought about it before proposing, and if I don’t want kids he’s okay with it because he doesn’t want to ask me to do something he knows I don’t want.

Tbh I think he thinks a little part of me does wants kids and I might change my mind, but I won’t. He often talks about what our children would be like, for example, today he said “our children would be such nerds” and laughed (we’re quite geeky).

I feel really awful and I’m really afraid he might resent me in the future. I met with my mum today and she said it’s selfish of me to not do what my fiancé wants. She also wants grandchildren.

I don’t know what to do - do you think it’s selfish? Anyone experienced this? I’d love some honest advice please.

Thanks for reading

TL;DR fiancé wants kids. I don’t. He said he’s okay with it, mum said I’m selfish and I feel bad.

Submitted January 27, 2019 at 11:06AM by manakitty http://bit.ly/2WocrIp