Background: My boyfriend and I have been together since October 2017. We were friends for a couple years before that and at one point I'd mentioned that I'd tried camming and I hated it. I just told it as a silly story among close friends because I barely used it. The last time I even logged into the site was in 2016.
Recently, when my phone wasn't working, I used my partner's to check my emails. I've since got a new phone but my email is still stored on his. He said it's not synced anymore. I mostly get spam and a few work briefs.
Today: I got an email from a cam website that I signed up to two years ago, telling me I should "broadcast again this week". It's the first email I've received from them in over a year, and the last time I ever did anything on the site was in October 2016.
Now that he's found this email (my account is still linked on his phone), he's livid. He told me that I made it sound like it was years ago - but I just mentioned it in passing at the pub once, telling some close friends about this dumb idea I had. I never said when it was, and I didn't think of it as a lie of omission because the conversation never went further than that.
I showed him my account history, and that I'd not been online for over two years - which proved that I was only online for a total of 20 minutes over three days even when I was active. I'm trying to prove that I never actually did anything on there and that I left because it was a lot raunchier than I thought it would be. I was in my late 20s but I was naive in thinking it would be a kind of Twitch situation where girls get paid to be cute and flirt.
But he keeps saying that I knew what it was when I signed up and that it's gross I even thought to do that as a grown woman nearly 30. He says I told a half truth about how long ago it was and now he can't trust me. He can't believe that I'd do something so stupid and gross, and he now questions whether I'm the kind of person who views sex as a commodity.
I explained to him it was at a low point in my life. I was broke and depressed and really struggling. I thought it would be a quick way to make money but when I found out what was actually involved I didn't go any further.
He then brought up other things I did in my past and is questioning everything about me. He said I "bragged" about having threesomes when it was something I mentioned in passing - and then later clarified that an ex guilted me into having two and I didn't enjoy either of them. He also brought up that I slept with someone in an open relationship, which was a stupid complicated thing that I talked to him about when we were just friends. He then said he doesn't know what other shady things I've done because I haven't been telling him the whole truth.
But I have. He knows everything about me. I never went into detail because I talked about it as just something I tried once. If I knew it would have made such a difference if I'd done it at 18 vs 28, I would have said exactly when I did it. We haven't even talked about it since the first time I mentioned it.
I don't know what to do. I've tried explaining everything to him and even showed him my account history to prove it was a small blip. But now he just thinks I'm a liar and have a shady past. How do I talk to him about this? Am I a shit person? How can I fix this?
TL;DR: Got spam from a cam site I was signed up to over two years ago and my boyfriend of one year found the email. I showed him my account history to prove I didn't do anything on it, but now he's questioning my character.
Submitted January 29, 2019 at 05:27AM by everydyingember http://bit.ly/2DEHJDm
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