Sorry if this comes out a bit rambly,
My husband and I have been together for almost twenty years now. We dated in High School, got married in our early 20s and have two beautiful daughters. Throught it all we've stayed very much in love and until now had a very healthy marriage.
My job situation on the other hand has been a rocky road. I've always had a job but its not until recently that I got something that pays very well. Working as an office manager and personal assistant to one of my old students from my college teacher days.
I barely even remember him and I didn't find out he'd be my boss until I got the job as the person who interviewed me was somebody else. He does remember me and said that when he found out I applied for the job he pushed to make sure I'd get it.
So here's the problems or well problems.
He has an annoying way of addressing women(always slipping ''mi vida'' y ''amor'') which for context I guess woud be like English guys who call women he's friendly with ''love'' all the darn time. I've tried addressing it but he keeps defaulting to it and defends himself as saying that's just how he talks but I notice that he doesn't use it with all the women in the office. As far as I can tell only me and two young women in their early 20s have to put up with it.HR is non-existent so I have nobody else to submit a complaint too.
He has a colorful dating past, including dating co-workers and is actually proud of it. Not to mention for a guy in his late 20s still comes off as very impulsive and lacks tact.
The job involves travelling as its basically a specialized call center and he travels around to meet new prospective clients, attend conferences, catch up current clients and checking on a sister company in a different city. I've already had to travel with him but it was a short trip and didn't have to spend the night in a hotel. The longer ones to the US are planned for later this year and one will involve a 10-day stay in Miami.
My husband understands we need the income, understands I'd never be unfaithful, and understands I'll jump to something else as soon as I can but this hasn't stopped him from feeling anxious over the whole thing.
I tell him everything and stuff like my boss saying I'm a proper woman and the type you don't find anymore makes him cringe. When I had to travel with my boss, my husband was constantly texted me, and even called me late at night. I told him he had nothing to worry about but he told me he couldn't help it. That he hates that I'm stuck sharing an office with some young guy who got lucky in life and maybe(or maybe not) is attracted to me. That when I turned down the job at first because they wouldn't meet the salary I requested just for them to call back an hour later to say they'd do it was his doing and might have been less about my competency and more about getting the ego boost of having me work for him makes my husband angry.
I admit it does makes me sad that my best paying job is working under somebody younger and somebody I used to teach. The awkward tension just makes it worse.
We're in debt as we took out a loan to open a business that didn't pan out, we're paying for our girls to go through an expensive private school and help out our parents so quitting the job is not an option. My husband has never even suggested it but the way he always asks me how my day was I can tell its eating at him.
I'm not sure when can I do besides constant texting through out the day to appease him. My boss right now even has a girl friend. Its just how he talks, his past and the upcoming long trips together that are needling at my partner.
tl;dr: I'm working for a boss that makes my husband uncomfortable. I need the job so I can't quit. What can I do?
Submitted March 21, 2023 at 10:17AM by ThrowRAaccoconut https://ift.tt/2qAjRFY
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