My (34) year old Girlfriend has initiated a break after nearly 4 years. I'm 38. What can I/should I do?

I will preface this by saying the following:

I was diagnosed with stress and depression due to work related issues in January (think 70 hours a week, stressful job role and work life in general. Currently on medication for depression, which is helping). I am also on the bipolar spectrum, and receiving help.

So, up until the 3 year mark, back in November everything seemed to be going fine, we'd never argued, and I mean ever, everything seemed perfect. She lost 2 people very close to her (one of which was her boss, from cancer, the other her grandfather who passed after a fall at home).

I've never really had a high sex drive, and this hasn't been as much of an issue, although she has mentioned a few times that i should try more. We'd be intimate 2-3 times a week, but it didn't seem bad. I should add, before we got together I'd been single for over 10 years, and she'd been single for at least 4 or 5. Our views on life matched, interests etc

January rolls around, and I'm signed off work for 3 weeks with the above mentioned stress and depression from work. She had mentioned that she wasn't as happy as she normally was. I tried to rectify this whilst also working through my own issues.

Throughout our relationship, I've always earnt more money, and had no issues paying for anything she needed (fuel, cigarettes, anything), and still happy to do so.

However. The last month or so, possibly longer, things haven't been the same at all. Not bad, just different. I know she's been helping one of her male friends with depression, no issue with me, I'm not the jealous type. She's been going on walks with him and just generally being there for him.

We went away for a weekend break last week. Throughout the break, she was distant, barely showed me any affection, there was no intimacy at all. We got home Monday, and she sent me message (I was outside smoking a cigarette, she was upstairs in our bedroom), basically saying she wants a break, and that she feels the relationship has fizzled out, amongst other things (I'm happy to add the message here for added clarification).

The last few days I've been sleeping I the spare room, which is fine. There has been zero communication between us at all, either face to face or via message, and we message all the time, everyday. Alarm bells have been ringing and I suspect she may be seeing someone else.

What do I do? I feel like a stranger in my own home. Are we over? Her family are furious with for treating me this way, and believe I'm the best thing that's happened to her in a long time.

TL:DR: Relationship of 4 years on break, unsure of what to do and need advice.

Message for clarification:

"We need to talk, I think we need a break from the relationship. I'm just not my normal happy self at the moment, and I feel like the relationship has fizzled out. I'm too nervous about saying it to your face, as I don't want to hurt you.

I just think a break would do us both some good so we can find ourselves again. I'm sorry to do it over message, but I didn't know how to say it to your face without both of us getting too upset. But I feel its the right thing to do right now xxxxxx"

Edit: added message from her.

Submitted March 16, 2023 at 05:15PM by Entropy84 https://ift.tt/Q4Ocz1E