My boyfriend has one best friend he has had for years. He is a really nice and smart guy. However, he doesn’t do so well with alcohol. About a month and a half ago right before Christmas he spend the night at our place getting drunk and playing video games with my boyfriend. He slept in the guest room and the next day when I went in that room to look for the Christmas gifts I had hidden there in one of the closet drawers I saw the drawer was open and empty. I looked around and found one gift shredded open on top of the closet. I went to my boyfriend and I was furious at him. Ultimately, I assumed he had done it. “How could you?! Those packages had my name on it and you know it’s almost Christmas! Come on man! Not cool.” And my boyfriend looked at me confused and a little terrified. He had no idea what I was talking about. I asked him where the rest of the gifts were, but he didn’t even know there were any. Then he said … “wait, my friend stayed over, I guess it must’ve been him”. Completely shocked by what he had said I continued looking for the other gift which I found underneath the drawer (it was a thin box with a video game in it). I went over it in my head wondering if I had done this and just forgotten, but there is no way I did. The gifts were also not just opened, they looked attacked. I could not have done that. He confronted his friend who denied everything. We left it at that, but agreed he shouldn’t sleep over if he is drunk for the time being. A month later we invited 4 friends over including him. He got quite drunk again and was acting out a little. He insisted on getting drugs even though none of us really wanted to participate. He was calling random numbers from other people their phones. And he was throwing game cards and folding them which kind of annoyed me a bit. There were minor incidents up until one point. I went to the bathroom downstairs (we have two bathrooms). And I found…well…there was shit next to the toilet. It didn’t look like a wipe of shit either, it looked kind of like someone took part of their shit next to the toilet and the rest in it. I went back to my boyfriend and told him to come with me for a sec. I pointed at the shit and said “babe, what is that?” And he looks at me a little disturbed but also with a bit of a grin and said “there’s really only one thing it can be…man it smells as well”. And I respond by saying “okay, then my next question is, who’s is it?”. My boyfriend laughed a little and said “do we really wanna know?” I entertained this thought and responded “who do you think it is?”. And he confirmed my thoughts exactly: well there’s only been two people coming down here so far and one of them is quite drunk…so yeah probably (let’s call him Jake) Jake. This is where I get a bit pissed and say that I won’t make a point of it, but I’m not cleaning it up and I am not comfortable having him over again for a while. My boyfriend decided to confront Jake and it only went downhill after that.
When he confronted Jake the following happened. Let’s call my boyfriend Chris. Chris: “Dude, did you do this?” Jake: “huh, what’s that”. -picks up the piece of shit and smells it. Realized what it was and threw it back on the floor-. Ew man, that’s disgusting. Chris: disgusted and confused about why he picked it up. “Yeah man, that is disgusting”. Jake: “how could you think I would do that?” Chris: “Well, honestly, I didn’t think anyone here would do that. But there’s shit on my floor isn’t there?”
Then Jake continues to deny he had anything to do with it and gets upset about my boyfriend even considering it could have been him. Jake continues using the following argument: “It could not have been me, because before I left I made sure to check with the flashlight on my phone to see if I had left anything behind.” … My boyfriend, trying not to escalate things, didn’t go into this too much. In addition, Jake was barely formulating coherent sentences. He seemed to be on the verge of throwing up.
The next few hours of what started out as a nice evening were about who could have taken a shit on the floor that night. It was the weirdest thing ever. I tried to not get involved because I realize I’m the newest member in the group and I didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. I don’t love confrontation either and felt quite uncomfortable.
At the end of the evening Jake went home. The following day we found a bunch of puke outside our door. Again, I have no solid evidence, but a very strong suspicion.
Now, I am not mad about this. He’s a super nice guy when sober. I also understand people do crazy things when they are drunk and realize this situation is also kind of funny. But it does make me wonder whether I want to invite him over again if I know it’s a social drinking situation. I also want to be considerate towards my boyfriend, they are good friends and I have no intention of making that difficult for them.
Am I being unreasonable in saying that, for the time being, I would prefer my boyfriend going to his friends place instead of having his friend over at our place? This wouldn’t be forever, I just want some time to let this shit sink in (pun intended). I don’t want to be uptight or inconsiderate, but I also don’t really like shit on my floor.
Let me know what you think. Thanks!
TL;DR My boyfriend his best friend got drunk at our place twice and one time he opened the Christmas gifts I had hidden for my boyfriend. The other time he took a shit next to the toilet. Am I uptight and inconsiderate for being annoyed?
Submitted January 24, 2022 at 03:42AM by AthenaAmsterdam https://ift.tt/3rINCr2
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