I (17F) feel pressured to start a relationship with my guy best friend (17M) and I do not want to. How can I explain this and prevent things from going somewhere I am not comfortable?

Hey reddit! I really need help. I'm 17 year old girl and a senior in HS, and I have a guy best friend (also 17) who lives about 3 hours away from me. We're both in Alabama. We've been friends since a mutual friend who moved from his school introduced us a little over a year ago, and at one point this past summer (like 6-8 months ago), i had a crush on him. His snapchats have been kind of flirty for several weeks now, and last week, he confessed that he really likes me and wants to start a relationship. I didn't really know how to navigate that and wasn't sure if I still liked him, and I was worried about trying to talk about it without being face to face, so I kind of put it off for a few days. However, before school starts back, a couple of our friends and us are supposed to meet up next week for a couple days at one of their lakehouses, which will put us face to face. However, from the flirty things he's said, the pics he's sent, and what he's implied, I'm 98% sure he definitely thinks i like him a lot too and he is expecting something sexual / romantic to go down when we meet up.

Unfortunately, I'm pretty certain that my crush from a few months ago is gone, and I really am not looking to get involved right now because I have a really busy spring and summer planned. I've never really done the typical teenage ~stuff~ with anyone and the idea of it all generally scares me, and I've had such fleeting crushes on guys that I've actually started wondering over the past year if I am on the asexuality spectrum because I'm just not interested in actually doing anything. (side note - i have already asked one of my friends for advice on this situation but left this specific part out bc i live in alabama). So I know for certain I don't want to hook up with him, and I'm worried that if I go through with the meet up, our differing expectations are going to make it go badly. I don't want to show up and have to deal with it that day or be pressured into doing anything either, so I think i need to talk to him before I go and explain that this isn't what I want to do and that if we're not on the same page, maybe it would be best for me not to go.

If y'all have any tips or a good way to tell him that I am not interested now and I'm not comfortable doing anything, could you please share them? I want to save the friendship because we've been good friends for a while, but I know that might not be possible, which really saddens me. Now, I just want to get out of the situation and I'm panicking because this all came up so fast.

TLDR: meeting up with guy best friend and a few other friends in a week, and he has made it clear he likes me and that he is under the impression i like him as well. based on the stuff he has said to me, i'm 95% sure he expects us to do ~stuff~ that couples do when we meet up, and I am not at all wanting to do that. how do i tell him this without hurting him, and should i even go?

Submitted January 03, 2021 at 01:30PM by Throwaway40404041 https://ift.tt/3ocZqir