TLDR: One of my closest friends is stuck in a house with her child and her emotionally/verbally/financially/mentally abusive ex and can't leave for at least a few months. I don't know what to do!
My friend (Jane) and her ex (John) were together for almost 10 years. They have a young child together. John has always been a bit rough around the edges, but it got worse once Jane got pregnant. AFAIK, he's never actually laid a hand on her or the kid but he is very physically intimidating and has broken things around the house when he's gotten angry. I'm intentionally leaving out lots of details of him emotionally, verbally and mentally abusing her to keep things vague in case he happens to stumble upon this post.
She was finally able to break up with him this spring but couldn't leave the house or go anywhere due to Covid restrictions and out of fear that he would somehow take their child away from her. She has an exit strategy but is still a few months away from being able to do anything.
After she gave birth, he refused to help pay for child care so she could go back to work and only gives her a small stipend each month for bills, so she's effectively broke and has nowhere to go. The pandemic has made it too dangerous for her to go to a shelter, no friends or family can take her in, and I live too far away to be able to help, though I've offered to send money which she has refused. The only thing I've been able to do is listen and allow her to vent, but we're pretty sure he's been monitoring her phone as well as he has access to it and my info keeps disappearing from her contact list (he hates me).
Over the past few days, it feels like she's been pulling away more and more. Restrictions in their area have gotten heavier, so I know he's been home a lot more so she doesn't have as much freedom to message me.
I don't think he would get physical with them, but I really don't know him all that well. I just feel so helpless and worried about her and their child. Worst case scenario, I can call their local PD to do a wellness check on them, but I'm worried that they won't find anything wrong and then he'll make her life even more of a living hell than it already is.
Submitted December 30, 2020 at 11:54AM by densebookworm https://ift.tt/34XFxnJ
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