I woke up with really intense neck and back pain today, and since I’ve been a little under the weather since I’ve been weaning off of an antidepressant I’ve been on for years, I went to treat myself to a massage. Everything was going fine, it’s a place that I know (or thought I did) for being clean and legitimate. Anyways, the lady starts touching me in places I’d rather not be touched, and I asked her to please just focus on my neck and back. She did, and then went right back to doing it again. I thought it was accidental, then it happened again, to the point where I knew it was deliberate. I rolled over and said I’m done and she then grabbed me— I’m not sure if this was a miscommunication (English is not her first language) or what, but I’m not feeling okay about any of this and I don’t know how to tell my (20F) girlfriend about this. I of course just put my clothes back on and left immediately after. I’ve spent the last hour just sobbing in the shower because I feel disgusting and like I somehow betrayed her trust.
Maybe worth mentioning is since I’m coming off of the SSRI our life in the bedroom has been less than desirable on my end, so it does not help this at all. We’ve only been dating for about two weeks but I just know that her and I are perfect for each other (we’ve had discussions about it and everything).
What do I do to proceed? I’m so lost I’ve never felt this before. How do I talk to her about this? Why do I feel like I need to keep this a secret when I inherently didn’t do anything wrong?
TLDR: I went to a massage parlor and they touched/did things to me that I did not ask for or enjoy. I don’t know how to 1 handle this emotionally or 2 talk about it with my girlfriend.
Submitted December 31, 2020 at 01:32PM by RepresentativeBorn50 https://ift.tt/3pBEYIc
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