My sister (25F) and I (28F) had always been on good terms, but that stopped a couple of months ago and I want to know if I've done something wrong.
My sister and her fiancé got engaged this summer (right around Father's Day). She FaceTimed me right afterward to tell me the news. It was a surprise (even for her), but my boyfriend and I were (truly) happy for them and congratulated them on their engagement. After the FaceTime call, my boyfriend told me that he felt a little disappointed because he had been planning to propose to me a month earlier while we were on vacation, but the vacation got canceled due to COVID. I reassured him that I was excited for his proposal, whenever it happened.
Fast-forward a month and a half (to the end of July): My boyfriend and I were staying for a couple of months at my parents' summer place, where my sister has been living for the past several years. My boyfriend found out that his grandmother was not doing very well, so we booked flights to go see her ASAP. {Side note: she made a remarkable recovery and is still doing well.} While we were there, my boyfriend proposed (and I said yes) - the ring he proposed with was originally his grandmother's! I FaceTimed my sister to tell her the good news, and she seemed very happy and congratulated us.
Two days later, we returned to my parents' place and my sister wasn't home - she was staying with her fiancé. We were a little surprised at this, but we shook it off. The next day, we still didn't see her. A whole week went by, and she still hadn't come home. This was very out of the ordinary for her, and we started to realize that she was avoiding us. It really hurt, because our engagement was supposed to be this happy thing, but my sister made us feel like we'd done something wrong.
Turns out, she was incredibly upset by our engagement. I'm still not entirely sure why (my parents also aren't entirely sure), but I think she feels like we're trying to one-up her or something. My sister also got really mad at our parents for "raising us to compete against each other." I know people who grew up in those sort of homes, and... my parents did no such thing. Anyway, she has continued to be incredibly cold to both me and my fiancé for the past several months. We had always talked about being each other's maids of honor, but she has boxed me out from any sort of planning (but only since my fiancé and I got engaged). She showed a picture of a potential dress to everyone else in a group and refused to show it to me. She invited the rest of her bridesmaids (plus my mom and her future mother-in-law) on a fun weekend to go dress shopping and to look at venues. I'm feeling simultaneously hurt, left out, and like I've done something wrong. She never apologized for avoiding us or tinging our exciting news with her bad reaction. I never apologized to her for getting engaged, because I don't think I should have to apologize for saying yes when my fiancé proposed...
tl;dr: I got engaged 6 weeks after my sister. She got really upset about me getting engaged, and I didn't apologize because I don't think I should have to.
Have I done something wrong?
Submitted November 04, 2020 at 08:12AM by PangolinPenguin371 https://ift.tt/2TToEoz
No comments:
Post a Comment