A few weeks ago I (28M) was touring houses and planning my future together with my wife (29F) of five years, now she has told me that she isn't sure if she loves me the same way anymore

TL;DR: Out of nowhere wife of five years is talking about separation. She suffers from chronic depressive episodes, but this time seems different. I feel so lonely and isolated (especially b/c of Covid). If anyone wants to chat (also happy to listen to you get things off of your chest), then send me a message. I could really use it.

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I'm absolutely crushed. We have had our differences and rough patches, but overall we have had a good relationship and we have always brought out the best in each other. We have been best friends, share a lot of interests, spend a ton of time together, had many adventures and experiences together. Last week she became distant and told me that she has wanted to spend some time alone (ex. rent a room for a weekend to spend some time alone and figure out what she wants to do). Over the next few days this evolved into talks of separation and her moving out. After talking about it today, she told me that she doesn't think that she loves me the same way she used to.

She has battled with chronic episodes of depression and gone through periods where she is aloof (we have suspected Borderline Personality Disorder), but she says this time feels different. She still doesn't know for sure what she wants to do. She is trying to see a therapist right now and we are not sure what we're doing. She says that she feels dead inside right now and just wants to be alone to find herself.

I am absolutely devastated and heartbroken. I'm an adult man and I'm not afraid to admit that I have been an absolute wreck and unable to keep it together. The worst part is still living together, being forced to see her constantly (especially because she works from home) and being unable to hold back the tears. I have never felt so lonely and isolated. I'm an introvert and have drifted apart from most of my friends. It's my fault for not cultivating more friendships- but damn does this hurt. Especially during Covid, I'm finding it very difficult to get out there and make some new friends to keep me sane. I'm really not sure what to do.

More than anything I just wish that she would tell me that she snapped out of it, that she loves me and wants to stay with me, that she is happy to be my partner in life. I know that there are other fish in the sea, but she was a truly unique person. I very rarely meet anyone that I would be remotely as interested in as her.

If anyone wants to talk (I can listen to anything that you need to get off your chest as well) then please send me a message. I could really use it.

Submitted November 03, 2020 at 06:22PM by Moschidae https://ift.tt/2I7BBbp