We got our adorable rescue a couple of months ago and I have gotten really attached to him. My fiancé works from home full time and I normally work part time but work is extra slow right now. Most of the dog responsibilities have fallen to me (after previous discussion of course). I take him to all of his vet visits, do 90% of the walks and do most of the feeding/training. My pup is definitely a mammas boy and I happily wear the responsibility. My fiancé knew that this was going to be the dynamic and has adjusted by being the main playmate for our pup. They rough house, tug, play fetch. I love watching them and love seeing my dog happy with his dad.
Now here’s the problem that I am fully aware is my own. Whenever my significant other suggests walking the dog without me or wants to hold the leash when we walk together, I really don’t want to let him. For example, I had a client early this morning and my fiancĂ© offered to take him on his AM walk while I was working. I hesitantly agreed but inside I was stewing. I hated not being there to see him play with other dogs. It ruined my morning routine because the walk/run first thing typically helps me clear my head. I feel totally ridiculous for being so upset about missing the walk. It feels completely irrational. I know my fiancĂ© should have a relationship with our dog that doesn’t always include me and I know that it makes my fiancĂ© happy to be included in raising our pup. It makes me worry about my reaction when we have kids because he will still be working full time and I’ll probably scale back my business quite a bit and be a SAHM.
I feel like this may have something to do with my last relationship. My ex and I had a dog together that I was mainly responsible for as well. I started working a 50hr work week around the time we broke up so it was best for my old dog to stay with my ex when I moved out because he worked from home. I think about my last pup almost everyday and I miss him a lot. Maybe I’m holding on so tight because I can’t experience the loss again? I don’t have a lot going on right now so this dog has become a large part of my identity. It makes me angry that people would assume that the dog is just my fiancĂ©’s if I am not present on the walk. I know I’m being completely insane. Please reddit, help me. This anxiety isn’t workable long term. Please give me some strategies on how to let go of my fears and my unhealthy attachment to our dog.
TLDR; I’m having an epically hard time letting my fiancĂ© take our dog on walks without me. I know I’m being insane but it feels good having all of the control. I worry about how I’m going to be when we have kids. How do I let go and be a better partner?
Submitted June 30, 2020 at 06:28AM by PinkRobotDog https://ift.tt/38j7YNE
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