My boyfriend [M21] is smoking pot all-day everyday during lockdown and it’s affecting both his personality and our relationship. I don’t know where I stand.

My boyfriend [M21] has started smoking pot all-day every-day during quarantine and I [F20] feel like it’s really affecting him as a person and it’s also affecting our relationship.

My boyfriend and I are separated during lockdown but have been together for a year and we’ve known each other for about 3 years. During quarantine we are living separately each in our family homes. As quarantine presents little to do, he seems to be smoking pretty much all day every day with his sister. It has been causing him to lie to me about what he’s doing and I feel like it’s coming between him and me.

I worry about him because I am seeing it completely change his personality. Normally he is this super motivated, intelligent guy but he’s turned into someone who gets out of bed at about 4pm, can’t sleep because of it and keeps making up excuses as to why he’s smoked, but I genuinely believe he needs it to get through the day. It just really bothers me when we are on the phone and he’s high and I don’t know if this is something I should really be feeling and I don’t know how to control it.

I don’t smoke myself, but I understand that used recreationally it’s pretty much harmless, however he is using my inexperience against me and it’s really hard to talk to him because of that. However I can’t deny it’s seriously changing him as a person and affecting our relationship at the moment.

I think it’s because it’s hard for me to watch him change but I don’t know where I stand and what it’s even okay for me to say in terms of helping him become healthy again. He doesn’t want the help and I don’t even know if it’s something I should be doing as his lifestyle is his choice, but there comes a point where I’m not happy and I’m unsure what to do to the point where I don’t know if I just need to remove myself from the equation, as I fear he sees me as trying to control him which is never what I intend, it’s just so hard to see him like this. :(

TL;DR, His excessive smoking is causing him to act differently all the time but is it okay that I feel this way about his excessive pot habits and how do I go about making the relationship better. Is this my problem and something I shouldn’t change about him but if so, because it’s making me so unhappy, is it time to leave?

Came to Reddit because I don’t have many people to talk about this with during lockdown. Hope everyone’s doing okay!

Submitted April 30, 2020 at 02:27AM by PinkYellowPurpleBlue https://ift.tt/3aJwsPC