I (27M) get enraged whenever I hear about my girlfriend's (29F) friends. They are all multiple time cheaters and I hate them.

Hey guys, could use some perspective on my sitch.

My girlfriend has two close friends + co-workers. Let's call them Jessica and Brad. Quick background on both.

Jessica (her best friend)

• Was previously married + dating her ex for 10 years
• Ended up making out with a co-worker, told her husband some time later, they still tried to work things out
• She ended up making out with another co-worker, didn't tell her husband to this day
• Her and her husband are now separated

Brad (fuck this guy)

• Was engaged to his fiance back in Europe (but is here in the US for work)
• Tried to invite my girlfriend to his hotel room one day for a company event offsite because "it's more convenient and she doesn't have to drive"
• I warned my girlfriend that this guy is scum, and she keeps trying to defend him
• Brad constantly tried to get my girlfriend's advice on "what he should do" because he "loves" his fiance but thinks something's missing
• Ends up cheating on his fiance with a different girl at work
• 1 year later, moves in with new girlfriend, then cheats on her LMFAO
• Starts bothering my girlfriend again and asking her to talk on the phone and shit because "he needs advice and wants it to work" (fuck you, Brad)

I get really upset anytime I hear about their situations because it's so repulsive and it also disturbs me how my girlfriend views their situations (basically doesn't think what they're doing is "THAT WRONG" and there are more deeply rooted problems about them that they should work on). Fair, but I wish she would just admit that what they do is fucked up.

Each time this happens, my girlfriend spends hours talking to them on the phone. And they give the same old excuses on "how they feel so bad" and how they should just "lay it on them for being a bad person." She then relays this to me + defends their behavior.

I also tell her I actually don't want to hear about it, because it makes me physically sick to think about. And actually angry. But she continues to tell me these things. When it happens I can feel myself getting upset and I can feel myself seeing my girlfriend differently. Some of the thoughts I have are "how can you possibly be friends with these kinds of people" and I lose attraction for her.

When she does tell me, I tell her I need space afterwards because these people and how they live their lives makes me irrationally angry. She ends up pushing me to talk about it more when I tell her to let me calm down first and give me a few hours so I can be rationale.

She has problems with letting me go during a discussion since she feels abandoned and we've talked about this before, but agreed that the best thing to do is let me take some time by myself. Except it never happens despite us agreeing on this. She tries to frame it as "oh just let me say these few more things" then keeps going and I tell her I REALLY can't be here.

She'll start saying how I'm not being compromising with her since all I want to do is leave the convo. Then we get in an argument because I start raising my voice (which isn't okay) because I think that's unfair. Anyway, as you all can tell I'm still upset by this. Could just use any perspective.

Two things I want to deal with:

1. My anger issues about this topic
2. Me starting to be turned off by my girlfriend's choice of friends

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TL;DR I hate my girlfriend's friends and it's causing me to look down on her.

Submitted April 26, 2020 at 05:38PM by actorkyleyeh https://ift.tt/2yPpg7q