“I am extremely attracted to you physically, sexually, creatively and intellectually” but he couldn’t emotionally commit.

So I finally got the dreaded “I’ve met someone text”

I 37(f) was in a situationship with a guy 38 (m) for 3 years with this person. The classic wouldn’t label, but wouldn’t let me go either. He has never had a relationship last longer than 8 months. I stayed in it was longer than I should hav but the investment was there on my side. He constantly said and demonstrated how much he was sexually and intellectually attracted he was to me. Often did nice things for me. Told me that he had never felt that chemistry with anyone else but wouldn’t emotionally invest. He had shit from past relationships (don’t we all). Anyway 18 months ago he moved to another country to look after his mum. Things continued as they had until I realised that I would be 50 and still engaging in this so went NC for about 8 months. We reconnected 6 months ago and he said “no one is as hot or as smart as you”. Anyway recently I have felt him pull away and I suspected someone was on the scene. His mum has gone very downhill and upon telling me he casually texts “I’ve met someone, I like her, which is rare. It’s got to the stage where I think I should tell you.” It felt like a sucker punch, particularly after a week ago when he sent me a video of him pleasuring himself and wanted one of me. I guess I now feel like it wasn’t that he couldn’t have a relationship but just didn’t want one with me… anyway I obviously am still hoping for something to happen and I’m so angry at myself for caring. And of course in my mind he will be this amazing boyfriend to her 🙄god damn it stings.

He said that he loved our intellectual connection but thinks it was a barrier to him emotionally going to the next level. I don’t get that, if I met someone I was sexually and intellectually attracted to I would so fall in love. Has anyone felt this? I guess I’m just trying to make sense of it.

TL;DR 3 years situationship told me he was extremely sexually, intellectually and creatively attracted to me. But for that reason couldn’t emotionally commit. And he is now seeing someone else. Has anyone else felt this?

Sorry for the ramble.

Submitted September 22, 2022 at 03:48AM by Purple_Concept_1739 https://ift.tt/H0cK3vu