My girlfriend [28F] has never cooked for me [29M] once in the 2+ years we have been dating and it upsets me.

We both work full time so we divide the chores but lately it seems to be overwhelming in her favor. I do all the cooking, my laundry + shared laundry (or sheets, blankets etc), all the grocery shopping, all the transportation (she doesn’t drive), all home related projects (painting, hanging tvs etc) and the trash. She does the dishes, her laundry and cleans the apartment. The thing is she cleans the apartment about once a month as that is all that it needs. We do not have kids or pets and I pick up after myself so it takes her about 2 hours once a month. She has started complaining about doing this. So I suggested we split having a cleaner come in once in a while if that would help her out. I figured that would be the equivalent of when I get a break from cooking every once in a while when we go out. I didn’t think cleaning once every month was something that required help, but hey an extra $50 or so a month isn’t something to fight over as we both make good money. The next chore that was an issue was the dishes. I noticed she stopped doing the dishes for anything that we did not make together. For example, my coffee cup. She would actually place all of my dishes off to the side and clean hers and the joint dishes. This upset me, as it made me feel like roommates and not partners. I told her that was equal to me only cooking or grocery shopping for myself. Did I mention we have a dishwasher so she is actually cycling a half full load just to not do my dishes?

I guess what hurts about cooking specifically is sometimes when she is stressed or tired I will do the dishes to take the pressure off her but she has never done that for cooking. When we first started dating she even mentioned a few of the dishes she liked to cook, but she has never once cooked them for me. Christ I wouldn’t even care if she just treated take out every once in a while instead.

Other aspects of the relationship have not been strong lately (sex, emotional bonding) and it has me starting to feel like I don’t have a partner but instead a roomate that I do the chores for.

It has got me thinking about what type of relationship I would want and I think I would want a more traditional relationship. Together my girlfriend and I make 350K but we don’r share finances. I don’t want children so I feel like I could easily support a spouse on half that. The only issue is that I feel like any woman who doesn’t want children is more career oriented. I just want someone who is a partner, but are there any woman who would just want to be a housewife without having kids?

Tl;dr I feel like chores are imbalanced in my girlfriends favor. It makes me like we aren’t partners and that I am servant. It is affecting other aspects of our relationship and making me wonder if this is the dynamic I want.

Submitted September 15, 2022 at 09:23PM by Gold_Ad4204 https://ift.tt/su4o9S1