I (26F) have been dating my boyfriend (32M) for nine months. We've been casual acquaintances for five years, then became closer friends in June last year, before going on a group trip together in November which really solidified our attraction and compatibility. We started officially dating a couple of months after that trip.
Last week I was on his phone trying to find a photo I'd taken. This was done in front of him, when I asked if I could send a photo to myself he unlocked his phone and handed it over to me without hesitation. That's when I noticed he had a photo album named after me, and I could see from the thumbnail that it was a text message I'd sent him. I asked him about it, he said he sometimes takes screenshots of our convos when they are particularly loving and nice. I thought that was sweet because I do that too, I screenshot his texts that melt my heart because it's easier to find them if you want to read them later.
I clicked on the album intending to read the text he had screenshot out loud to him, but scrolling through I noticed that within the album weren't just screenshots of our texts, but also screenshots of my Instagram posts. When I asked him about it he seemed really embarrassed but he told me that before we started dating, back in November when he first started catching feelings, he went through my IG one night and ended up screenshotting every single photo. I've been using IG for a decade, I have over 900 photos on there. He screenshot every single one. Apparently he got very drunk one night and got caught up in his infatuation with me, he scrolled all the way to the end of my feed and then screenshot them all so he wouldn't accidentally "like" any of them when he was looking at them. He said he liked having that glimpse into my life and my past, looking at the dates and thinking about where he was and what he was doing at that time, all the ways our lives unknowingly intersected over the years through mutual friends, music gigs, etc etc. He acknowledged it was intense and weird and that he was embarrassed.
I would like some advice on this, my friends are telling me it's creepy and stalker behaviour, but I don't agree. I know that back in November he wasn't doing very well mentally, and he acknowledges it was an intense and weird thing to do. Maybe I'd be more worried if it came with other concerning behaviour, but this is the healthiest relationship I've ever been in. He's sweet and thoughtful and sentimental without being controlling or clingy or overbearing. He gives me my space when I want it, he communicates with me. I'm really happy. My friends who I've told this to used to think he was great, but now they think he's a stalker and they think I should run. And now I'm worried because I'm not seeing what they're seeing, could I be ignoring a red flag?
TL;DR Boyfriend went through my instagram and screenshot over 900 photos of me before we started dating
Submitted September 25, 2022 at 07:35PM by Appropriate-Beach463 https://ift.tt/xEu2ZB0
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