Currently unhappy in my [22F] relationship with bf [32M] of almost 2 years.

It’s always about him and his needs.

He reverses the blame and blames me for every single issue we have.

I feel like I am being gaslit by him whenever I call him out on anything. It somehow always becomes my fault.

He’s overly defensive.

He has ADHD which makes him a shitty partner (late to plans, can’t plan for shit, extremely low conscientiousness), whereas I am the opposite. He games a lot and wastes time on stupid shit and tbh was self admittedly a loser before he met me because started university late in life (he’s only graduating now), and is financially fucked. Oh and he’s also divorced.

I’m the complete opposite of that. I have my shit together academically, professionally, and financially.

I’m getting fuck sick and tired of him making everything my fault. Even when I use non violent communication and apologize for my parts it doesn’t fucking matter bc everything is my fault apparently.

He’s also a fucking condescending dick in general. Literally all of my friends, and even my acquaintances that know him say he comes across as an arrogant know-it-all. And he is.

Idk what to do. I’m just venting. I guess maybe I just want him to change his ways but I can’t control another person. Idk how to talk about in a way that will fix stuff.

Ofc I have my issues too, I get mad easily at him now and am critical and unforgiving. But look at what drove me to be at this point. I don’t get it cuz when we have good times he’s considerate and actually seems like he isn’t a dick. But idk anymore. I’m kinda tired of always having to justify myself and every action I do/say/take.

Our relationship is almost 2 years old, and mostly went downhill at the start of our second year together. Before it was paradise. All of these problems have worsened in the last 5-8 months.

TLDR: Bf is exhausting and not fun to be around bc I’m blamed for everything and I’m not sure how to bring it up in a way where he won’t be overly defensive and a whiny baby about things.

Submitted September 25, 2022 at 08:39PM by unemotionals https://ift.tt/BwG1hRV