TLDR girlfriend spent night at exes ( sees him as a friend) got drunk didn’t answer calls or texts.
My (m43) and my girlfriend f(43) have been exclusive for around 6 months , and together for about a year before that and we get in great she tells me she loves me a lot. We had just got back from a trip to Oslo which I whisked her away for as she’d had a crappy Christmas with Covid screwing up hers and my plans. She’s told me about this ex previously but had stated they were just friends. She’d told me other positive details about the size of his appendage too which I won’t go into details here. But she said there’s nothing between them and she hadn’t seen him in ages. I went away on a theatre trip with my boys and she sends me this
“I’m off to meet X for pub then dinner at his: you have NOTHING to worry about, but I would never lie to you and pretend I was off somewhere else. I love you, trust me. Call me this eve if you have ten mins. I’d love to hear your voice. We’ll only be in the pub or hanging out. X x x x”
Well I tried to call and text but she didn’t answer or pick up texts which is unusual for her. Anyway cue sleepless night and in the morning she calls I see she goes online, then offline and then she calls and is sheepish, I ask her where she was and she says at his house and she got drunk and spent the night .
I’m annoyed and tell her it’s over. For the next two days she’s really upset , says she doesn’t see him as an ex only as someone in her circle of friends who she gets on with. I’ve never met him. I don’t know he lived an hour away and I didn’t know she was spending the night and of course when your girlfriend tells you not to worry about something you know she thinks there’s a potential issue.
We’re a few days after now after two days of her being incredibly apologetic and upset. Saying she’s ruined the best thing that’s ever happened to her. We’ve met up since and she’s bawled her eyes out and been genuinely remorseful saying they danced together in the kitchen and she was showing him pictures of us too on her phone and she got so drunk she didn’t check her phone and slept in his spare room.
I find myself in a situation which I don’t want to be in here. I do love her but whereas before I could see a future with this woman. I’ve lost some certainty here and find myself holding back now with what I give to this relationship. We’ve talked and established some boundaries but I don’t want to be the asshole that stops her seeing her friends. We have a great sex life, get on like a house on fire and find each other really attractive. Should I let this go?
Submitted January 14, 2022 at 11:24PM by Dontreallyneedtoask https://ift.tt/3frzI6V
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