I've [28f] got a "friend" [30f] I can't shake. I've known her for 6 months. Initially I hung out with her because I was new to the area but I quickly found out that she is just a really unpleasant person.
She:
- Talks shit nonstop. About everyone. I think I've maybe heard her say a kind thing about someone twice.
- Is insanely negative.
- Is insanely judgmental.
- Throws huge tantrums about random things in public.
- Doesn't say thank you.
- Is possessive as a friend - doesn't want her friends being friends with other people.
We live in a small town in the midwest and it's easy to run into her. Her husband is really close friends with my husband. (Btw: her husband is GREAT - super kind, fun guy.) She texts me every day asking to hang out, and if I see her after ignoring it, she makes a big deal about it. I also live a few blocks from her.
I WANT to ignore her texts, but I also don't want to face her wrath. She will obviously talk shit about me to anyone who listens if I piss her off (and probably already does.) I'm a people-pleaser and really struggle with advocating for myself.
She recently had a baby (and no longer works at her job as a paralegal), and she seems to expect me to hang out with her all the time and help her take care of it. Which - no offense to people with kids - I haven't held a baby in ages and I don't really like them. I probably won't have kids and I definitely don't want to take care of someone else's.
I feel bad for her because she's so hard to be around that she has like... no real friends. None. I threw her baby shower because nobody else would do it - and I barely know her!
I 100% (obviously) have trouble saying no to her, and wind up sacrificing my own happiness and time because either a) I pity her or b) I don't want to rock the boat. I love where I live and I want to enjoy it... but I feel like I can't right now.
What do I do? How can I gracefully avoid her without hurting her feelings and making things awkward between our husbands? I'm the type of person that is really independent - I typically hang out with my good friends like once a week MAX - and I feel like a hostage. Do I just stay SUPER busy?
tl;dr - "Friend" is making me miserable and just generally not a great person. How to I end our friendship without making things awkward for my husband and without gaining an enemy?
Submitted September 29, 2021 at 05:44AM by helpmegetawaythx12 https://ift.tt/2XYQBR9
No comments:
Post a Comment