I (35f) used to be a very secure and confident woman. However, since being in a relationship with my boyfriend (31m), my insecurity has risen to a point where I feel really bad about myself and have developed trust issues.
Is this my insecurity issue or is he putting me down?
My boyfriend is extremely good looking and attracts a lot of women, he admits that his ego likes the attention. Here’s the thing. He has told me that he usually goes for fair skin, blonde/ red haired fairy-looking girls. Whose Skin and body are perfection. He says he thinks big boobs and sixpack are the hottest thing. Well, I am half- Indian, I have small breasts and I am not as toned as someone with a sixpack would be. I asked him what this means (and I regret asking a question I really didn’t want to hear the answer to), and he admitted that I‘m not the kind of girl he would usually go for- especially regarding my body, and that he isn’t as sexually attracted.
He has a female follower base on instagram and likes their fair skinned, bikini, sexy posing pictures. When I used to scroll through instagram, I admired the girls but also knew lots of it was fake. Now, I feel like every blonde athlete is pretty much my competition. That’s what I need to compare myself to. That’s what he‘s attracted to.
When he goes out, he tells me of all the hot girls that were there, how they looked like, what they wore, how sexy they were.
When I tell him his remarks are hurtful, he says that he absolutely loves me. He says it in a way like it cancels out everything else, the highest praise of praise, and just by him saying that, I should feel confident enough. He says love is about my personality, the way I am- looks and figure are just cherry on the cake. When I ask him why he tells me these things about other women, he responds that 1) It’s just the way he feels and sees other women, he could not tell me but he would still think it. 2) He asks why I always make it about myself, why can’t he talk about how pretty other women are? There can be many other attractive women next to me, and yet he chose me. 3) Sometimes he agrees his use of words are hurtful- not the content itself but the way of expression.
Do his arguments make sense or is he just really insensitive?
TLDR; Boyfriend makes comments about other women‘s appearances- am I too insecure or is he too insensitive?
Submitted September 01, 2021 at 02:35PM by appledairy https://ift.tt/38xnkyN
No comments:
Post a Comment