Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/itcxtb/i_26m_cant_handle_my_wifes_26f_pms/
I'm thankful for all of the comments on my original post. I really started to wonder if it might be PMDD. When she was calm, I talked to her about her mood swings. She agreed that it was a problem but didn't have a clue what to do about it. So, things stayed mostly the same.
Now, I was also struggling (still am) after the death of my father. At a routine check-up with my doctor, I told her about my symptoms of depression. She agreed that it sounded concerning and got me an emergency referral to the psychiatrist (these are the only kind of referrals the hospital was accepting due to covid). In the meantime I got started on anti-depressants.
Seeing how easy that was, I went to my wife and brought up my concerns again. This time I was able to tell her what to do and what might happen. It turns out that she has GAD, the pms was only exacerbating it. However, this really didn't excuse her behaviour around the funeral.
Some comments pointed how my emotional needs weren't being met. That was a pretty big understatement. I was in huge denial around that time. I felt like I could do nothing for my wife. Or for anyone. Life just felt like endless suffering. I ended up attempting to do a lot of bad stuff to myself.
When I finally was contacted by the psychiatrist, I explained my situation. It was casual for a bit, but then I told him what I'd been doing and.... Well. He told me to admit myself to the hospital or he'd send someone to get me. My wife was in complete shock when I told her what was happening. But she brought me there.
When she first saw me again, she apologized for how distant and awful she'd been. I didn't even bring it up, but she apologized about the funeral. The 8 hour trip had really stressed her out, and she'd been incredibly anxious about the funeral, covid, baby planning, etc. But she told me that none of that was an excuse. The time apart really gave her time to think.
She got me everything I needed. She visited tons, and there were hours of time to talk feelings. She worked with my doctors on safety plans, got me a bunch of welcome home gifts, and she has been a lot more helpful around the house.
The medication she's on has really leveled her out. She's very happy to be on it too and says she doesn't feel crazy anymore.
She's continued to be amazing. Usually I'm the one that does most of the christmas stuff, and usually I give all the best gifts. She's always struggled to get me things I like, but this year she actually outdid me. I have so many switch games now. Guys. I haven't gotten to them all yet.
I'm still having a rough go, but she's always telling me to not stress and focus on recovery. I'm really happy to have her.
tl;dr My wife has GAD and I have severe depression. we're both being treated and things are a lot better.
Submitted January 24, 2021 at 11:30PM by VelvetShedding https://ift.tt/3ojoxPI
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