I have been with my girlfriend for a bit over a year. One of the biggest difference between us in her eyes is her college degree.
She came from a broken home and most of her family didn’t even graduated high school and was constantly told she could never go to college. So I can understand why this whole thing is such a huge deal to her. She have tried to encourage me to go to college.
Me... I came from a working class family and never attended college. But I did very well at my career and am making a decent living at it.
I never really cared about who make more money. In beginning of our relationship, I told her the barest minimum of my income since my earning wildly varies. She was taken back a bit because it was almost as much as she make and she have hefty college debt to pay for.
Over the time it got harder for her to not notice that I was making way more than what I told her (it isn’t exactly something I can predict) I bought a new car that cost bit over $40k, I helped my brother with money for two month when he and his wife was out of job, paid to have my girlfriend’s car fix, and other things.
This Christmas, I got two very big bonuses. I have never seen such a big bonus from my company before. I wasn’t expecting it at all! So I was able to treat ourselves to a very nice holiday. Then recently I got hurt on job and would need a surgery and few weeks off.
My girlfriend freaked out over this thinking I don’t have any money. When I finally told her what I have made in a year and how much I have saved up, it was hard.
I could see that it really hurt her. It was almost as if she felt like the whole world betrayed her. She eventually broke down and cried and told me she hate her job and life because she felt like she worked so hard and is still living with roommates, driving a old car that constantly have new problems, and constantly struggling to pay bills. This was the very thing she worked so hard to try and get out of her whole life.
I think it also really sting her pride massively.
Now I feel like a ass every time I spend money, try to plan something, talk about work or my schedule, or anything that might remind her of money or career.
What can I do to remedy this situation?
Tldr; girlfriend learned I make way more than her despite not having a college degree. This greatly upset her.
Submitted January 20, 2021 at 04:59AM by UsernameisCodeTA https://ift.tt/35XELaK
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