My (22F) boyfriend (26M) is very sensitive, I can't even have a constructive conversation with him. I dont know where to go from here.

TL;DR my bf is very...sensitive...every time i try to have a constructive conversation with him. He takes everything very personally, yet refuses to accept personal blame at the same time. I dont know what to do.

I've officially been with my bf for the last 2 months, though we've known each other a short time longer than that. We both live in a rural area and met because we are neighbours.

My boyfriend is very affectionate and despite what I'm about to delve into, I am very happy.

In order to explain my predicament, I'll give a scenario example. I bought him a hoodie for his birthday. He likes "x" auto make, but his stepdad and I are "Y" fans. Despite this silly rivalry that always happens between the two types of "truck people", I bought him this hoodie because I know he likes his own brand. After giving it to him his stepdad was just giving him a hard time for his hoodie and I joined in. For context, we were all laughing and he was giving it right back to us about our favourite truck make too.

Well the next day he was in a bad mood from work and it kinda triggered these sad moods he gets into and he got mad at me for making fun of his favourite truck brand. I felt bad because it was 2 against 1 and said I was sorry.

The next night I was over at his house for dinner and his stepdad apologizes to me out of nowhere saying that he felt bad that he made me upset. You read that right, the stepdad apologizes to me. Because he thinks I got upset because I was supposedly upset that he was making fun of the hoodie I got my bf for his birthday. I was like uhhhhhhh? And clarified that he didnt make me upset at all and pointed out that I joined in and I thought we were all having a good laugh about it.

So basically....my bf lied to his stepdad saying that he made ME upset by poking fun at the hoodie which threw me under the bus for no reason, but my bf got mad at me just the day before for poking fun of the hoodie WITH the stepdad. Basically, he lied to us both to get sympathy because HIS OWN feelings were hurt.

Now heres my dilemma. He is adamant that he misunderstood the situation and didn't mean to lie, but that makes absolutely no sense to me at all. But this happens every single time something else comes up where we catch him an exaggeration, or even a straight up lie; he says he misunderstood, or calls himself an idiot, or immediately says "fine. You're right I'm wrong" (which doesn't feel genuine). In a way it's like he just jumps to these statements to avoid a fight. I know he doesnt actually believe hes an idiot because other times he boasts about how smart he is or how school couldnt handle him because he was too smart for the class (i.e. math).

I don't like how these arguments go because it just doesn't seem like we ever get anywhere with them. I don't know how to change it so we can have actual constructive conversations when it comes to situations like this.

Submitted January 24, 2020 at 11:37AM by throwm333away https://ift.tt/36qstp0