In the past year I was forced to move out and live on my own. I ended up getting my own place and as a result I have gotten really serious about my finances and my future. Meanwhile my BF, who I'm compatible with in every way but one, has revealed himself as someone who is kind of lazy.
His finances are a train wreck. Think $20 in his bank account. Lives with his mom and is always late paying rent to her. He also borrows money from her sometimes because he has absolutely zero savings. 10k in student loans. 5k in credit card debt. And he works... 15 hours a week making $25 an hour.
He has no degree... just a mediocre skillset in a trade that is extremely undervalued in our economy. He does not work to improve his craft. He makes minimum payments on his debt and lives in a high cost of living area which pretty much guarantees he'll be in debt forever. But to me the worst part about all this is that he seems to be fine with his situation. He plays games with friends and goes out to eat all the time like nothing is wrong. His situation doesn't seem to bother him and he doesn't seem to have any sort of ambition or desire to pay down his debt and move out of his mom's house.
I put a subtle ultimatum on him the other day. I told him I don't want to be with someone who is not pulling their own weight. That I deserve to be with someone who works as hard as I do. He says he's applying to places but I feel like... he's all talk and nothing much will come of this. I think his real plan is to take the path of least resistance and sponge off of his mom and the rest of his family forever.
I love this guy but I feel like I would be signing up for a lifetime of supporting him once he moves from his mom's house in with me. I really do love him but the real side me recognizes that waiting for this guy to get his shit together is likely a waste of time. If he hasn't done it by 30 its probably not happening. Am I being too judgemental?
TLDR: I love my bf but he's lazy and content to mooch off of other people. I'm a hard worker and I want to be with someone that works as hard as I do. I'm also afraid I will end up supporting him if we stay together. What should I do?
Submitted January 03, 2020 at 09:02PM by throwaway050681 https://ift.tt/36pa90l
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