I [24F] am widowed and just found out that I'm pregnant, don't know if I should keep the baby or not.

Four months ago, I got married to my husband [28M]. A bit over a month later, we were involved in a car accident. My husband died immediately while I survived with a brain injury and some fractures.

Of course, I was devastated. My husband was the love of my life. I truly don't think that I will be able to find another man as genuine, kind, handsome, and devoted as him.

After the accident, which occurred less than 3 months ago, I experienced missed periods. My periods were always irregular and I figured that the stress from being in a coma probably contributed. I got a positive pregnancy test last week and did my first ultrasound today. I am 11 weeks pregnant. I am 100% certain that it is my late husband's.

I don't know what to do. I told my parents and my siblings. My mother believes that I should terminate the pregnancy. She says that it is hard to be a single mother, especially a widowed one. She says at least if I was divorced the dad could still be a part of the child's life, but this way, the child will never have a father. This is her advice, but she says she will still support me if I keep the child. My father agrees with her. My siblings more or less agree. My sister says that if I ever decide to start dating again, being a single mother would severely hurt my chances. She says I should concentrate on my career and worry about having children when I'm married again and am ready to start a family.

The thing is, I was ready to start a family. But with my husband, of course. I am more than financially capable of giving the child a good upbringing, and I have a lot of family supports. But I don't know if I should, purely because I don't think I'll be emotionally ready to be a single mother, especially not while I'm grieving my late husband. Selfishly, I also know that if I ever plan to date again, having a child would be an obstacle.

I'm not particularly religious, although I used to be Christian, so I don't have a particular aversion against abortion in normal situations. But I feel that if I were to terminate my pregnancy, I would be "killing" my husband's child. It would be like losing both my husband and my baby in the span of several months. I don't know if I could ever live with myself.

This is the worst dilemma of my life. Where I live, abortion is acceptable until the 20th week, but I know that the procedure is less taxing if it is done earlier. My family and even my siblings are saying I should terminate the pregnancy, while I am personally still on the fence. Any advice or experiences would be appreciated.

TL;DR: I am a widow who just found out that I am 11 weeks pregnant. I do not know whether to terminate the pregnancy or not.

Submitted January 02, 2020 at 08:11PM by tomkrapprr https://ift.tt/37q9o78