Me [31M] with my Wife [31F] of two years. Wife wants to try open relationships for a short while. How do I rationally react to this?

My wife while being tipsy, casually suggested a few weeks ago if I am interested in a temporary open relationship for "fun". She suggested that we have to approve the each other's partner for safety reasons and that we'd have to talk about boundaries. I didn't know how to react and I was shocked that she wanted this. I asked if she had someone in mind and she referred to this coworker in her hospital that she works at. This tells me that she definitely has a crush on him so much that she was willing to change the terms of our relationship wtf.. I was honestly hurt and she saw that and immediately retracted it said that she wanted it to be fair so I can experiment with someone too but realizes that is inappropriate.

She's been genuinely saddened that I was hurt and really feels bad because its been pretty tense between us for the past few weeks and we haven't been intimate since. We had many talks and I keep telling myself that she was very honest and open about it, she didn't act on it, and she feels bad about it. She kept reassuring me that she has no emotional feelings for him, and joked that he was 'built' like this guy that she fantasized about from some book that she read when she was a teenager. She is a psychiatry resident and I dunno how the fuck she has no tact.. because this really hurt. I know she was trying to reassure that she loves me and I am the guy that she wants to grow old with but wtf. She told me that if I wanted a leggy blonde she wouldn't be pissed since she's only like 5'3". With just everything I say she counters with something that sounds rational and it pisses me off even more. Am I wrong to feel hurt and betrayed? I mean everyone has thoughts I guess and in her fairness she didn't act but be honest. Sorry to ramble so much.. its honestly just been really frustrating.

tl;dr wife finds coworker attractive enough to want to sleep with him

Submitted February 25, 2019 at 11:55AM by dripthrowaways https://ift.tt/2U6w8Ty