My close friends (mid to late 20S F) didn’t invite me (26F) to bachelorette party; now I’m not sure if I should go to the wedding

Throwaway account here.

I’ve been close friends with 4 other girls since college. We all met around the same time in school and I can say we’re the closest friends each other has from that period of life.

After we graduated, we slowly moved away to different cities. Now only two girls still live in our college town. Those two meet up regularly, and the rest of us come back once a year for a week-long vacation/reunion. We’re very close as a group and we have an active group chat where we update each other on our love life, career, etc.

One of the girls, let’s call her A, is getting married in July. In our reunion last November, she said that she wanted her bachelorette party to be in June 2019. Another girl, B, is the maid of honor, and she said she would plan for it and get us together. Naturally I hadn’t thought to ask B about the party since it’s just January.

Then last night, another girl in our group texted in the group chat about finalizing the hotel situation for the bachelorette party because it’s happening NEXT WEEK. Then the rest of the group started to chime in and decided on the hotel. They all already got their plane tickets. So they all knew about it. I’m the only one left out. I didn’t reply in the group chat. About 10 minutes later, A, the bride to be, texted me separately and said that she didn’t know if I had heard from B but was wondering if I’d like to join the bachelorette party. Obviously they just decided to invite me because someone texted in the group.

I told her I couldn’t go because I had no idea it’s happening so soon. I didn’t say much, because I wasn’t sure if it was her idea to not invite me or if it was B’s idea. I’m not mad, I think I’m just hurt. Nothing was out of the ordinary and we all had a great time last reunion. I don’t know why they wanted to exclude me or who wanted to exclude me. I can’t think of one thing that happened between November and now that made someone suddenly hate me.

I haven’t talked to anyone since my short chat with A because I don’t want to make it a thing and ruin the mood for the party next week. I did get the wedding invitation, but now I’m not sure if I should go. July is a very busy time for my project, and the wedding is in Mexico (8hr flight from where I’m at). I had previously decided to set aside 3 days for the wedding, and my boss was very upset. I don’t know if I should even bother with the wedding now. I want to be there to celebrate my friend’s important day but at the same time, I don’t want to be the guest that they’re secretly hoping I won’t show up but I show up anyway.

We’ve been friends for years and I always thought that we would be friends for life. I keep thinking back to try to figure out if I had done something, but really nothing has happened since the last time we met. I thought I was a bit closer to A and B and if this was happening with another girl in the group, I would ask A and B for advice/clarity. Now I don’t know what to do.

TLDR: I was excluded for a good friend’s bachelorette party; everyone else in our friends group was invited; now I’m not sure if I should go to the wedding

Submitted January 03, 2019 at 02:02PM by heifhhhsx http://bit.ly/2QmoKkd