My GF of 9 months recently, and suddenly, lost her older brother. It breaks my heart to see her like this and I want to help her as much as I can. I want to be there for her and to listen to what she wants to talk about. However, she is pushing me away and getting angry at me for small things. She started arguing that she didn't like my response to something she said via messenger for example. We kept arguing, but I know this was not the time for us to argue since she's grieving the loss of her brother so I just took my bike and visited her in the hope of calming her down and just being there for her. Instead she repeated the things she said via chat until i started feeling guilty about it. She said things like that she can't talk to me about her loss, that I don't understand it, that she needs to be around people (yet she's pushing me away everytime i ask if she wants that I visit her), etc.
I'm quite an emotional person and when she kept breaking me down when i was with her today, I started crying. Crying because I felt like i failed her during these difficult times for her. She noticed and hugged me which calmed me down. But now I have an even bigger feeling of guilt because i'm supposed to be her emotional support right now (which i was for the last few days, but today I broke down), yet here I am being a complete idiot. I feel so stupid and like such a huge egoist to cry about this, something so insignificant, while she has been grieving the loss of her brother the last couple of days. I've apologized to her about this and she said it was OK.
but still, I feel like a terrible partner.
What do I do? I feel like I should give her some space and not text her as much. Or would that come across as if I'm not interested?
I'm visiting her again tomorrow, and I'm hoping I can emotionally support her and not the other way around.
TL;DR: I feel guilty for not being able to emotionally support my GF today, who is currently grieving the loss of her brother. I feel like a terrible partner.
Submitted April 07, 2023 at 05:56PM by BetaJelly https://ift.tt/tn3HcuS
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