BFF and Maid of Honor (30F) suddenly lashes out at me over something so petty, and tells me she was just tolerating me as a friend. I am beyond heartbroken.

My BFF and Maid of Honor (30F) and I have been best friends for 15 years. I consider her my sister and confidante. I am getting married July of next year and we went to the fittings for the bridesmaid dresses (which I am paying for) to get her measurements with the other bridesmaids. Then I asked her, "How is your mom and your family?", in front of my other bridesmaids. I thought it was no big deal, because I was genuinely just curious about how she and her family are doing. She answered my question calmly, and she was fine and happy the entire day.

I messaged her the next day to see if she wanted to have coffee with me. She iced me out for 5 whole days and I didn't know why. She was still active in her stories and social media tho. I was worried that she might be going through something and I wanted to be there for her but then I gave her space. Then after 5 days, she messaged me angrily saying, "I was rude and insensitive to ask about her mom and family in front of my other bridesmaids". I apologized to her and told her I didn't know I shouldn't ask that. I told her that I am sorry for being careless and I didn't think it was a big deal. I told her that I would be very careful next time about the things that I say around other people.

BUT THEN she got more mad at me. She kept sending me paragraphs of how I am an awful person, and how I don't deserve to get married, and how she is just tolerating me, and how my friends and other bridesmaids are just tolerating me because I am a mean and insentive friend. This was so out of the blue and unexpected. She just errupted. I still kept on apologizing to her, but the mean things she is spamming me is starting to get me angry.

She even brought up stuff from the past just to support her narrative that I am a bad person, like:

1. I made a joke about her crystals. I remember I said, "If my my arm falls off, I'm just going to rub a rose quartz on it and it's going to grow back". (She knows that I am a skeptic, and it was just a joke and I didn't know that it hurt her that time.)

2. I don't like her boyfriend. (Well, he cheated on her 3 times and always kicks her out of their apartment when they fight! What is there to like? How would I like someone who is hurting my best friend?)

3. She told me I am the reason she failed her Law Bar Exams because I am "bad luck". (Wtf? I supported her during the Bar! I brought her food while she was studying and encouraged her when she felt hopeless.)

She even went so far as to force me to invite my ex-friend (M35) who physically assaulted me while he was drunk, to my wedding. He slapped me so hard I thought I lost my hearing and I was not able to hear anything from my left ear for 3 weeks! I cried because I thought I would never hear again from my left ear. She said, that I am so mean and petty that I cannot forgive that ex-friend and invite him to my wedding". Why would I invite him? He PHYSICALLY ASSAULTED me and he was not sorry about it. He never apologized even years later! She just brought that story up out of nowhere to support her narrative that I am a "bad person". She even tried to gaslight me by saying I am just inventing that story about the slap, which I am not!

She even said that she was just TOLERATING me! Since when? Since the beginning? It made me question my entire friendship with her, because I honesly saw her as my REAL friend and it is so painful to hear that my BFF of 15 years sees me this way.

This is so weird. I don't know what to do. It's just very abrupt and out of the blue. I thought we were fine. I thought she was happy to be my best friend, and I don't know where this is all coming from. I need help and advice. Should I save the friendship of 15 years or cut it off? Should she still be Maid of Honor or not?

I appreciate all your input. Sorry for the long post.

NOTE: She threw the gifts I gave her when I asked her to be Maid of Honor in the trash outside of her house. She messaged me and said if I want it back, I can find it there. I went over to her house and got the silk pajamas I gave her.

tl;dr: BFF suddenly explodes at me and gets angry at me over something so petty. I thought everything was fine between us. Should I save the 15 years friendship?

Submitted December 01, 2022 at 11:13PM by Parking-Bathroom1235 https://ift.tt/1jtRGPf