Girlfriend (22f) and I (23m) have been dating for 2 years now. Last half year has been long distance and it's been taking a bit of a toll on both of us. The solutions for the future seem extreme, is it time to commit or let it go?

TLDR- I'm moving states away from my girlfriend and it's either we fix our long distance problems, she moves to me, or we break up. All the options suck. Need advice.

My girlfriend (22f) and I (23m) started talking then dating over covid. The last couple years she's been amazing and fun to be with, easily my favorite person to be with. In May, she graduated from our college and moved onto grad school, while I had one semester left. The school she goes to is 3 hours away from where we went for undergrad and we've been trying everything for long distance stuff, as in making plans to see each other at least twice- 3 times a month in person, calling every night, gifts and other convinces, and even occasionally sitting down to play a game or watch a show together over discord. But it's been taking a toll on us.

At least personally after we hang up the calls I kinda spiral into my anxiety, especially because this is my last semester and I have to worry about things like jobs. Which is kind of the catalyst to this event, as I would be moving 3 states away for a job. It's an exciting job with good pay im excited for. But I'm worried I can't keep up the long distance for 3 years while she finishes grad school. She also feels lonely and sad without me there too. Which is where it kinda blows up.

She is worried her school is going to lose accreditation for her program due to teachers leaving and lack of leadership. Which is making her thinking about coming to the new state with me. It seems like such a big jump for her and it's really such a big commitment I honestly don't know I could advise her to do it if I was an unbiased person. As for myself, I am not sure if I am ready for her to live with me in my apartment either, it's a big new city and I would be traveling a lot for my job. Also I would be locked into the relationship at that point, I can't just make her move a thousand miles to dump her!

My choices now are do long distance for 3 years and suffer at the hands of my anxiety alone for a shot in the dark at a lifelong partner, have her move with me to this new state, something I'm not sure either of us fully understand or are prepared for, or end things and lose my favorite person that I've had.

Any advice would be helpful. I feel like I'm losing any way you cut it.

Submitted October 24, 2022 at 10:18AM by the-tank7 https://ift.tt/teHUWwo