Hi. Just asking here because I’m not quite sure how to feel. I live with my boyfriend and we just celebrated our five year anniversary last month. We have discussed marriage and kids together and are in a pretty serious relationship.
We have both been in serious relationships before, I was divorced when I was about 20 and then went through a failed engagement a couple of years before we met. I’ve been super open with him about all of this. I’m generally an open book type of person.
He told me that he was engaged before me to a woman who I know he still keeps in contact with. I don’t mind that at all and see it as a green flag when someone doesn’t hate their ex. I knew they had a dog together and I totally get them wanting to check in every once in a while. We have talked about our previous relationships dozens of times before and he has always maintained that they had a broken engagement and never got married because things didn’t work out. I’ve spent our entire relationship thinking that I would be his first wife.
I recently found out that a lot of things are public record. I was just playing around searching myself and decided to put his name in. I was shocked - right in front of my face was the divorce record of someone I share my life with.
I waited a day and brought it up with him. He told me that he blocked it out. He didn’t really have any other explanation than that.
This was about four days ago. I am not really sure how to process this. I feel like he doesn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth. How could you forget going through a divorce? How can I trust that there aren’t other things he hasn’t told me about? I’m hurt because I’ve been so honest with him from the beginning. The weird thing is that I completely don’t care that he was married before. I just want honesty.
He hasn’t said much to me over the past few days. I’m not sure what to even say at this point. Would counseling be a good option? Am I making too big of a deal about this?
TLDR: I found out my boyfriend of 5 years was hiding a previous divorce.
Edit: the divorce was with the woman he told me he was only engaged to. Sorry - that wasn’t clear!
Submitted January 04, 2022 at 10:32AM by suppertimes https://ift.tt/3pY9wXQ
No comments:
Post a Comment