Using a throwaway because he knows my main.
So long story short, my (22F) partner (25M) (1y+ together) got a brain injury almost 2 months ago, fell in a coma and is slowly recovering in a specialised establishment. He lives in a different country, but I was able to visit him once in hospital, otherwise we talk by message or calling. I will come in a week or so to stay there permanently (we planned on moving-in together before, I will just be with his family at the beginning).
He overall has a good recovery, but he still needs to be in a facility, especially for physical therapy. The thing is, he is not himself yet (if he ever will be). He gets confused about places, doesn’t remember small and big details about his/our life or common knowledge, sometimes has a different kind of humour, messages randomly and overall doesn’t really care about me. I understand, on a rational level, that all of this is normal considering his condition, I understand that he made huge progresses since he woke up, and that I have to be patient. I am not blaming him nor do I want to break up.
But emotionally, it is sometimes really hard. I feel like I am a girlfriend, but I don’t have a boyfriend. It may sound selfish but I have big things happening in my own life and when I share them, he’s not reacting at all. I have family and friends, and I am in permanent contact with his sister, so it helps. But I would like to manage better, on a daily basis. He used to be my go-to person, and I don’t know how to transition to keep being his go-to person and emotional support while dealing with my own emotions/life events in a healthy way, without resenting him.
EDIT: because it's coming up already: We've been flatmates before being together. We lived 3 months together in the country he is in at the beginning of this year and I made a few friends there. I am a freelancer and can work from anywhere so the move wouldn't be damaging my professional career. My family and friends are very much spreadout so the support I have is mainly through phone.
So any testimonies, any advice and comment is appreciated on how to navigate this situation. Thank you!
TL;DR! I lost my emotional support and still have & want to be his. How do I do?
Submitted September 01, 2021 at 10:39AM by TBI_boyfriend https://ift.tt/3DFCBvR
No comments:
Post a Comment